Trav's Total Experience

Are Ya Ready Fo' Grindhouse?

2007-03-31T00:35:00.000-04:00

I can't tell all you cats how excited I am to see Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino's Grindhouse April 6th!
DAYUM!
Nah, make that DOUBLE DAAAADAYYUMMMM!!!!!
Anyways, for those of you who don't know this film consists of 2 exploitation, drive-in type films separated by fictional movie trailers and sneak previews.
It'll be like going to 42nd Street back in the day and seeing those CHEEEEAP B movies or soft core porn movies.
Hell, Dolemite is a great example.
Anyhoo-a horror director I don't really care for (Eli Roth of Hostel and Cabin Fever fame-crappy films) has made a fake trailer for the fictional slasher film "Thanksgiving" and it is OFF. THE. CHAIN.
You know how in the late 70's (after Halloween) and into the 80's, slasher films tended to be titled after a famous calendar day of the year (ex. Friday the 13th, Halloween, Black Christmas, etc)?
Well, this one is for that famous day in November.
Think: Silent Night, Deadly Night with turkey.
I love in this and in the movie how they make the film look rough and aged.
Gonna be soooo awesome.
It is REEEALLY graphic though, so, NOT SAFE FOR WORK.
Watch this shit at home and not at work. Can't stress enough.
Check it out below.
(Quick hint: Let the video load the whole way before hitting play. Otherwise, you in for some EXXXTRA choppy stop n' start viewing!)

M-M-M-M-Monster Squad!!!!

2007-03-28T12:06:00.000-04:00

Hey muthas!
After stalking the local bookstores last week and beginning of this one, today I have found the new issue of HorrorHound on the stands at the local B&N. (Available at Borders and Barnes & Noble bookstores).
After holding off, here is the Monster Squad art I did for the 20-year retrospective article:

With any luck, this'll be going on the upcoming DVD release of the film in October of this year.
I am gonna change the design around a little possibly for prints to sell online and to take to horror conventions. To be honest (speaking of design change, the above art is not really the version used in the mag). Cleaned it up a bit for inclusion on the dvd. Re-rendered a character (figure out which one when you see the version in the mag) so that they look much better).
I also illustrated my usual 1 panel piece for the mag as well but you're gonna have to hit the bookstores to see that shit. Go git the mag and see fo' yoself!
C'mon people! If I gave away everything for free, I'd be pimpin' alongside all the unwashed masses on the freeway offramps here in Gainesville. (TRUST ME when I say it's a hott biznazz here in Florida!)

Groan-Inducing News: This Just In!

2007-03-19T08:47:00.000-04:00

Thanks to Lady L for the heads up.
Go to this news breaking article here.
The world is coming to an end.
Yes folks, it looks like another classic is hitting the remake train.
Dolemite is being remade and looks to begin shooting this fall.
The article states they have been "looking for stars of comedy and hip-hop" for casting of the lead.
I SWEAR if they get that fuckin' Cedric the Entertainer's unfunny ass or Steve Harvey or one o' those lame-ass comedians like that, I will SCREAM. They have been in talks with Snoop Dogg as well.
I read up on this after L gave me the link to the article and found out Dimension films bought the rights to remake it back in 2001 and LL Cool J was attached to star as not a pimp, but more of an entrepreneur (to be more PC for the times). GAG!
Guess it went into development hell and is now back from the guy that brought us the big screen crap remake of Car 54! Where Are You?. Who the hell watched that?? Rosie O' D was probably the only one.
Oh Lady Reed, who is in heaven right now, please shine your light down and halt production on this shitty remake.
May your role of Queen Bee NOT be filled by someone like Mon-ique or one o' those unfunny ho's.
God help us all.
UPDATE: Go here to see more updates on this horrendous idea! WAYNE BRADY?!??! YIKES!
At leassss he's not playing the LEGEND himself, Dolemite. Maybe the Revrennd?

1 Down, 2 To Go

2007-03-17T20:53:00.000-04:00

Amongst other things in my life lately, there was something recently that was keeping me up at night.

Something I have been waking up in cold sweats about for over 2 years now.
I figured it was time to do something about it.
I wrote fan letters to the Golden Girls in hopes of getting their autographs.
Muh girls don't have that many years left in 'em and I wanted them to know how effing FABULOUS they are.
Unfortunately, Miss Estelle Getty (Sophia) is suffering from dementia and does not receive fan mail anymore.
However, the other 3 girls do and your truly wrote them each a gushing fan letter along with a SASE in hopes of getting a signed 8x10 glossy.
This past Friday, Rue McClanahan's came back to me (wrong addy). Found a newer one and remailed today.

All my dreams came true this afternoon when we came back and checked the mailbox to find:

My dreams are slowly becoming a reality, people.
This shit is truly golden.
In other news, I am working on revising the previous Monster Squad illo that I turned in to HorrorHound for it's possible use on the upcoming DVD and for later print-selling and shit at conventions and online.
Also, just got a book on Flash and am getting ready to speed-learn the program cuz Travy-T's doing an animated music video for the band Circus of Dead Squirrels, for whom I have done artwork for their upcoming cd release, "The Pop Culture Massacre And The End Of The World Sing-A-Long Songbook".

Birthdays Keep My Blog Alive!

2007-03-10T23:04:00.000-05:00

Big Happy Birthday wishes goes out to muh girl in Skavannah, Miss Jen Norwood.
Hope you have a great day today and party it up! Ask Paula ta bake ya a birthday Hocake with exxxxxxxxkra butter.
Seriously, my dear: Happy Birthday and enjoy yo day!
In other news, I continue to promise to update this blog soon with other posts and news.
There is a plan to have a new blog on my website, ibtrav.com, sometime soon.
Lotsa projects in da meantime.

Happy Birthday Wishes...and I'll Be Back Soon!

2007-02-21T10:39:00.000-05:00

First of all, Happy Birthday to my pal Laura who's turning the big 3-0 today!
Hope you have a bitchin' day and as a birthday present, get running water!
AHahhaaa!
I will be back soon peeps with some regular posts.
Since last we talked:
-Went to Savannah with Bri and Mel
-Stacy visited
-Went to Orlando
-Worked on updating my website-adding a blog soooon!
-Got booted from YouTube
-Finished some major work in freelancing
-Been downloading rare soundtracks off the internet (new obssession).
-Just fixed some links on this blog and took down my YouTube link (boohoo...fuckers!)
If anyone has anything I promised to mail them (cds, etc) please remind me on the comments.
I willlllllbeeeee bacccck soon!

Take A Look, It's In Da Book...Reading Rainbow!!!

2007-01-10T11:54:00.000-05:00

Hello fiends!

A little slow outta the gate on this one, but, I wanted to let you all know that you can see some of my work in the new HorrorHound magazine that hit newsstands about a week ago or so.
Inside the issue, you will find another editorial cartoon I did as well as view the amazing ad for IBTrav Illustrations the editors letme include within their blood-soaked pages!
If you can get to a Barnes & Noble, Borders, or even a Hot Topic (who miiiiight carry it), check out all the Trav-y art goodness!
Here's hoping the New Year will provide much happiness and success for all you'z out there!
Peace out...

Merry Christmas.

2006-12-25T17:25:00.000-05:00

Just Thought Of This...

2006-12-14T12:48:00.000-05:00

Ok, so I am thinking more and more the girl that was riding the bigbearraftingwhatchamadoo ride at Disneyland this past November with me, Duane, Bri and her mom was, in fact, Sarah Chalke, star of Scrubs and Roseanne.
That is all.

Here Comes Da Bride...

2006-12-09T22:40:00.000-05:00

OMFG!!!
Talk about random.
So, it went down like this:
I get a message from someone on YouTube about my Newlydeads clips I posted.
This person said they wanted to purchase the film on DVD, where can they located a copy?
They close by saying they were in the movie and signed their message, Scott Kaske.
Well, I instantly went to Internet Movie Database, searched the name and realized it was none other than Jackie herself, messaging me from beyond the grave!
I was exxxxstatic! I messaged back that I and my friends were huge fans of his and we wanted autographs, loved his work, etc. I also gave him the info online to purchase a dvd of the movie.
He messaged back saying thanks for the help and that he is a very private person and unfortunately couldn't give out his address to send self addressed, stamped envelopes for autographed photos. He thanked me for being a fan and said there has been a lot of noteriety from this movie and he has discovered there's a fanbase. He wants to set up a website, etc., etc.
I thought that was that, and was happy to have heard from him.
I then receive another message from him asking for my email addy. He said he had something for me.
I was a little wigged. I don't trust peeps on the 'net. Some nutsos out there.
I was talking to our good friend Fanny on the ol' AIM while some o' this was going down and she told me just to give the addy to him, change it if he's a fake asshole.
I gave it to him, expecting to get back a picture of a gaping sphincter hole close-up with the word SUCKER stamped on it.
Lo and behold an email did pop up minutes later with an attachment.
The email read like this:

"Hi Travis

I don't give out my email address either so please keep in touch with me through the you tube sight and not this address.

This should prove who I am, I had these taken inbetween takes while we were filming.

I couldn't take them myself or I wouldn't be in the pictures.

But I scaned these pictures and e-sighned it for you.

Please let me know if it comes out.

Thanks

Scott"

and attached to it, was this:

I just about shit myself!!!!
What I found before me were 4 scanned in on-set pics from "Jackie" with a PC mouse-scribbled autograph to me saying "To Travis: Loving you to Deth, Jackie (Scott Kaske).
Now, at this point, I have believed the guy and am in heaven.
I email him back, saying a million thanks and my friends would die over this shit and I sent him the Jackie paper doll I created along with a link to the posted pics that Bri and Mel took of Jackie's Trek Across the World! In Epcot. I also threw in the famous pic of Jen with her colored Jackie paper doll.

He was ecstatic!!!!!
This is the email I got back from him:
"OMG I can't belive this, It even looks like me.

What a nice surpise, you did such a great job.

Im so humbled, I don't have the words to say what my emotions are doing.

Thank you so much."
I asked him a few questions about the film, also how it was to work with the incomparable Miss Jean Levine.
I have yet to hear back from him, but I will definitely keep you all posted.
Needless to say, my day, possibly my YEAR was complete.

Happy 30th, Bri!

2006-12-07T22:22:00.000-05:00

Someone call Oprah!
It's my bess bud Bri's 30th BIRRRRTHHHDAYYYYYY today!
Happy Birthday, sir.
You have hit a milestone and are more wise for the wear.
(More importantly, you still have your hair.)
(Some of us should be so lucky.)
Have a great day and party hearty!
(I'll blow my nose for ya! I'm sure it'll be 30 times!)

Case O' The Frumpy Wumpies

2006-12-04T10:25:00.000-05:00

I'm feeling sick as a dawg.
Down in tha mouth.
Case o' da nasties.
Taking meds and all that jazz.
You know what they say:
A spoonful of sugar...
THIS has put me in a better mood recently and I hope you enjoy it too.

Okkkkkk so I am backkk!

2006-11-29T16:25:00.000-05:00

Yo.
I am slow on the blogging, I know.
Today, I uploaded pics from our trip to the Lehman/Calvert Wedding Tour 06' on Flickr.
Go here to see 'em.
We really did have a blassss and it was soo great to see them and Jen and Bri's bro Steve again.
Southern Cali was really nice, not like I remembered it.
I wanna go back again.
Also, Josh's and Steph's family were so damn cool.
It was great to finally meet em'.
What I wanna know is.....what we all gonnnna do for our May get-together this year?
Lessss all think about it, ok?
Can't wait to do it again, and visit da King's Inn.

Happy 20th, Rachey-E!

2006-10-23T16:49:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday wishes go out to my lil' sister Rachel, who turns 20 today.
I am so proud of you and can't believe how old you've gotten.
It was just yesterday I was changing your saggy diapers.
Boy, did they stink.
Anyways, Happy Birthday Rachey-E!
Love yooooooouuuuuuUUU!

Quickie

2006-10-22T15:42:00.000-04:00

Click on Chucky above to check out the autographs I got at the recent horror convention in Orlando last weekend.
Also, have to tell you all that
1- The new Texas Chainsaw movie was better than any in the series (including the original). Disgusting, vulgar, bleak, depressing, but DAMN EFFECTIVE.
2- If you haven't, check out Best Week Ever on VH1 this weekend. There were some pretty funny moments.
3- AMC has the top 15 scariest horror films again this Halloween. I have a reeeeaaaaal problem with their #1 choice though. The movie was horrible and SCARIEST?!?!? You kidding me?
4- I just logged in all the DVDs in my collection on a website and the number is over 400.
I need help.
Transmission out.

Weekend-A-Paloooooza!

2006-10-19T10:49:00.000-04:00

Whew!
Back home from visiting everyone in Orlando this past weekend!
And whatta weekend it was!
No ressss for the weary here.
D and I left for O-Town Wednesday late afternoon.
I had made some tees before we left for myself, Bri, and Stacy to wear to this horror convention we were going to on Saturday called Screamfest. The tee designs and stuff wore me out because at first I had ordered them through a company online and then at the last minute they emailed to let me know that I had violated their copyright laws (having licensed imagery on shirts).
So, quickly finding and implenting a plan B, Duane and I went and bought some cheeeep tees and purchased the inkjet tee transfers (thanks for the tip last year about those, Steph!).
The tees turned out beautifully and we were glad we did them this way in the end.
I had also created some promo cards to hand out at the convention (art posted above).
On Thursday, D and I went to Universal Studios (we have annual passes and DAYUM those are worth it!) and then that night met up with Bri and Mel's sis Rachel for a HOTT time at Halloween Horror Nights.
Lotsa screamin' jumpin', jivin' and wailin'.
Luckily for me, Rach was there with us and she could be the token scaredy cat.
My gig was finally up.
Friday, we met up with Bri, Mel and Rach for some awesome din din and caught a midnight showing of one of my favorite films, Fright Night at the theater at CityWalk at Universal Studios.
DAYUM that was AWESOME! On Thursday, we found out about the showing and I literally embarassed Duane in public I was so damn thrilled.
It was the original print of the film so it was all scratchy and shit.
There wasn't no love for Charlie Brewster or Peter Vincent that night though, cuz we were the only ones there. Everyone else was going to see that damn Grudge 2 crappola.
What's with kids today and their shitty PG-13 horror? UGH!
But I digress....so anyways, D and I were totally drunk and still enjoyed Fright Night.
Saturday, as I stated above, me, Bri, and Stacy went to the Screamfest horror convention at the Wyndham hotel. Smaaaaaaalll-ass convention but plenty of geeks, freaks, and nutballs to keep us entertained.
I blew my load on some autographs of BARRRELY famous horror film peeps and got photos.
Check em' out on my Flickr page here.
I will be posting pics of my autographs on there soon!
Saturday night, Bri, myself, Duane, Mel and her sis went to the Parliament House for Pride Weekend and caught Miss RuPaul live!
AWESOME!
I also got a chance to give her the artwork I created a while ago.
She said she "TOTALLY remembers that" when I emailed it to her some months ago.
She thanked me, laughed and said it was really good (the artwork) and grabbed my hand and said thanks again.
I got her to autograph another copy of the artwork for me to keep.
I'll post that shit later too.
That night was a blast and ended with a lovely trip to greaseball heaven, Steak N' Shake, where I downed another Caramle Apple shake with wild abandon (and mooched cheese fries off of Mel and Rach).
Duane left Sunday and I stuck around with Bri and we went and saw Jackass 2 that night after we caught an ep of that Tyra model show.
The BEASSSS that got kicked off that night had me crying with her HORRRRRIBLE pass at modeling as a bearded lady.
Steph! You woulda WORKED that shit for all its worth! Too bad you weren't available.
That bitch just embarassed herrrrself.
On Monday, Bri and I hit Universal again and tried to ride rides but damn if they weren't like, saving money and shit and only running like, half the rides and all.
Lines were longer than usual and all but it was still cool.
We had a badass time.
Then on Tuesday, I met up with Stacy (whom was a gracious host for me and D for mossst of the trip) to go to the Disney Halloween event.
It was cute and had some badass decorations and a pretty awesome parade (usually not into that crap but it was good).
You could go around the park and trick or treat and I gorged on candy that night (and last night to be exact). Hell, that candy is running my life currently.
Ever had one after the other of Airheads? That shit is good.
I think I can hear my teeth scream in pain, but, oh well.
Whatta damn good time we had.
Wish everyone could get together this year for Halloween, but, maybe next year or that following year.
We'll make it work.
D and I are heading to O-Town not this weekend but the following for a sleepover par-tay with horror movie marathon and food galore!
Anyone wanna come up, LET US KNOW!!!
Otherwise, we will see the majority of you guys soon enoough in a few weeks!
We be PUMPED!

Recent Artwork

2006-09-28T23:02:00.000-04:00

Hey guys!
Just wanted you all to know that my recent work featured in the horror magazine called "Horrorhound" has hit the newsstands and the issue has been sent out to subscribers recently.
I got mine in the mail today and I was VERY pleased with how my work looked printed.

The illustration was to be of Rob Zombie directing the new Halloween film (which he got the gig to direct-should be out sometime October 2007). It's a one-panel joke/comic that has him directing his mainstays (actors in his other two films) in the roles of characters from the original Halloween movie. This is more than likely not how it's gonna be but a comment on how he likes to use actors he is familiar with in all his films (including his wife Sheri Moon).
Needless to say, this project was right up my alley.
I am pleased with the way it turned out and have to thank the guys at Horrorhound for seeking my out and giving me the opportunity to have my work published in their mag (was already a subscriber and fan beforehand).
If you wanna seek out this magazine (issue #4), go to your local Hot Topic stores in the mall, Barnes & Noble, Borders, Waldenbooks, Tower Records, or B. Dalton Booksellers.

Keep your eyes glued to the blog for more posting of recent works (when I get permission by clients!)
Hope this finds everyone well and good!
PEACE OUT!!

Procrastinatin' Patrick

2006-09-09T17:42:00.000-04:00

So, I haven't been working alot today.
I'm what Rachey-E calls a "Procrastinating Patrick" today.
I did finish a To Wong Foo music video that I have been working on in my spare time lately. That thing was calling out to me in the middle of the night to finish, so I did.
Not really liking it a whole lot (too frenetic, not a solid meaning to it all), but, I am glad I did it and got it out to You Tube for peeps to check it and all. Hope some die hard Stockard Channing fans enjoy it.
Up next, a 9 to 5 tribute music vid.
Keep yo' eyes peeled, peeps.
In the meantime, bask in some of this Vida-Noxeema-Chi Chi goodness:

Ok, back to work.

All By Myseeelllllf

2006-09-05T19:46:00.000-04:00

Hello, bloggers.
I am currently all alone for the week whilst D is visiting family in Kentucky.
I am alone and procrastinating like a mutha on projects.
Nah, really I am being good but have been taking long pauses to clean, or work on a badass music vid for YouTube or, like today, took a trip to see Little Miss Sunshine for my Tuesday free popcorn at the local cinema.
That movie was my favorite movie of the summer next to The Devil Wears Prada.
Ya gotta go check it out.
It's a movie Bri would say "Has heart".
Me, him and Mel were gonna see it this past Saturday when I went to visit them but we all were too tired and decided to stay at home and laugh at Lifetime movies.
I have to say that was a friggin' BLAST! Just like the good ol' days...except with yummy homemade ME-X-ICAN!
Anyhoo-I am also blogging to start a nice little coloring contest here at Trav's Total Experience. Upon Ray Ray's church trip travels recently (see her blog sometime soon for a post about that amazing experience HOPEFULLY SOON, Ray!), she brought back to me what could be described as a Walmart-special, chubby-thick, cheeeeepieee coloring book.
At first glance, I was bored to tears.
Then, as family was over during my last visit to Roanoke, I had a sinister idea.
I began to deface and "filthify" the coloring pages to make my own naughty coloring book.
By drawing over the line illustrations or adding to them, the drawings took on all new meanings.
This had me and the family laughing our asses off for a good while.
Now it's time to share it with you guys.
I am going to post 2 pages for your coloring enjoyment here and on my IBTrav Illustration profile on Myspace so that my MS peeps can get in on the fun.
Here's the catch: only you select few cool people on this blog will be eligible to win a filthy prize for the best creation.
Print out one of the following coloring pages, colorize it or add wackiness to it, then email it to me to post on this here blog.
Submissions need to be in to me no later than next Friday, September 15th at midnight.
Get wacky, get crazy. Just don't get into trouble at work (ie printing em' out or viewing em'). They're kinda naughty. Tee hee.
Winners will be posted on this blog Monday, September 18th and will receive their (yet to be determined filthy) prizes by mail.Here are the first two images to choose from.
Click on the one you wanna print out and deface and it will take u to the large size, printable version:

Deface them any way you will, just make sure they are colored and emailed to me.
Keep your eyes peeled on my IBTrav Illustrations Myspace page for other color pages to print out, color and put up on your fridge for yo' mammas to be proud of!
Ta ta fo' now, bitches. Big Brother is almost on...

Swirlo's my Manager

2006-08-22T13:30:00.000-04:00

I wanna thank Jen for getting me back in the ring like Rocky to post.
To tell you the truth, I have been kinda busy here lately.
Ya see, I have been talking with a local company about a possible full-time job with them.
They expressed full interest but the position is one they would have to create for me specifically and we are awaiting some of their upcoming contracts to determine if my possibly-newly-created-position is one that is viable for them at this point.
In the meantime, they gave me some freelance work for their website, which was great.
It had me down a little because I was hoping for a fulltime job.
But now here's the freaky part...and I swear it feels like an Oprah moment.
As soon as I met with their company on a Friday about the freelancing gig and returned home, I received some emails and Myspace notices for some freelance work.
After being bombarded that afternoon with some wonderful business prospects, that night I was contacted by another client to do some more work.
At this point, I won't go into specifics (will keep you all teetering on the edge like a cliffhanger), but I will say these are some very interesting jobs and will definitely have my work seen at a higher level.
It all happened at once and Travy-T is feeling like a real freelancer now!
I am gearing myself towards freelancing more seriously now and also spending more time getting my name and art out there for promo purposes.
Really has openend up a whole new world for the Big T.
So THAT'S why I have been MIA for a little while.
I also have some side projects that I am working on in my spare time such as another music video for YouTube (think: Larger than life. It's just the right size.) and another painting series which I call "Atta Girl: The 9 to 5 Series". I am posting an in-progress pic below.

Hope all of you are well and are staying filthy and lowering yo London Bridges like Fergie.
One mo' thing:
Please bombard Rachel to post on Dirty Bird Special Post Haste! Tell her we need a NEW POST NOW! (Either that, or we will all send her John Tucker Must Die! ecards in her inbox). Yikes!

Happy 30th, Fanny Eubanks!

2006-08-02T12:48:00.000-04:00

Ok, my pals have to have birfdays more often so I can have a reason to posssss.
Happy 30th Bday wishes go out to my bud Fanny in O-Town!
Hope you live it up today grrrl on yo birthday!
You desssuurrv it.
Just like Jackie desurrved to get an ice pick in the temple!
Happy Bday!!!

Hello there and big Happy Bdays to Some Buddies!

2006-07-22T15:50:00.000-04:00

Yo everyone!
Happy Birthday to two great friends o' mine today!
One is to my best bud Joe who is turning the big 3-0!
Hope you, Staplerman, have a great day!

Nextly, is Miss Stephanie Lehman (soon to be Calvert).
Hope you "tear it up" on your birthday today, girl. Have a great one.

I am in Roanoke, VA this week because my grandma passed away recently and a road trip has been in effect since Saturday. Big thanks go to Jen and John for letting me stay with them in Savannah. It was also good to see Miss Kimberly Larson along the way as well.
Will chat with you all lata!

Gasp! Choke! Is it True?

2006-07-13T14:58:00.000-04:00

Yes, I am back, kittens.
I am back and D and I are in the Sunny state of Florida.
Things are going pretty good.
The house is still up for sale (recent buyers fell through), we are in need of furniture here at our apartment, I am on the fastrack to a great job (more later as to not jinx) and life is grand.
More importantly, there is a birthday announcement for one of my good pals who just visited us this week.
Big 3-0 BDAY WISHES go out to Stacy today!
Happy Birthday Grrrrrl!
Hope you celebrate in style and enjoy the rest of your time off!
30 is such a milestone. It's monumental. It's....ah, who the hell am I kiddin? It's just another damn birthday!
Hope you enjoy it girl!
Thanks are also in order in an announcement form fro Bri in getting the www.ibtrav.com version 2.0 up and running! Thanks to his handywork, I might have just nabbed something (see, there I go again with that job thing-more to come later!)
Hope everyone is well (Steph and Josh magnets are THE in thing this year! I am LOVING MINE!)
Everyone take care.
Until another post in a few months,
(just kidding)
Z Big T

Odds n' Ends

2006-05-30T20:00:00.000-04:00

So we got an offer on the house.
Probably the first person that looked at it. It's contingent on if their house sells.
Good news is that we can keep it up on the market and if someone else makes an offer, we can take theirs and can the first one.
Other than that, D and I got away this weekend to Greenville, SC and stayed at a bitchin' hotel with indoor pool, internet, and a nice atrium bar with a cool bartender, Janice.
There was a wedding when we arrived and the mofos were out in full force.
Big hats, hamhocks on paper plates, purple suits, pimp hats.
Needless to say, it was a HOT MESS (D and my fave term right now).
We went to the Freedom Weekend Aloft festival in Anderson, SC on Sunday night and saw Rob Thomas with Collective Soul and a young rock band opening that were pretty good.
Yeh, D and I are big Rob Thomas fans.
He put on one HELLUVA show. Click here to see footage D shot with the digital camera (beware sound quality). As you can see, we got up pretty close and it was in an outdoor ampitheater.
Drunks, rednecks, farting boozehounds, Republican housewives, the whole nine. We had a blast! Made a lot of friends that night (prolly some enemies).
It was a great time and a good chance to get away from this house crap.
Today, D was home sick and I didn't do much but put my resume up on Monster, Careerbuilder, Hotjobs, and bothered the hell out of a company in Jax that I applied with mid-May. (Crossing my fingers on that one).
I also need to (even though I don't know if this is the right forum) give a big THANK YOU to my pal Steph, who really made my night when she called and was telling me she was "selling" me and my art to her employer for possible freelance stuff down the line. She said her boss was saying she would consider my work for possible future designs in the company's Buffy tshirt license line.
Miss Steph Esquire, you don't know how cool that made me feel by doing that for me. You didn't have to, but I appreciate it GREATLY!
Thank ya!
And also peeps: Did you all know that Miss Steph and her beau Joshua Calvert are registered with Target?
D and I were farting around in the Target in Greenville and I just, on a whim, decided to check out their bridal computer and lo and behold, our future newlyweds were in the system.
We printed that shit out and read it all through the store! You guys got some cool stuff on there!
Also, I think we mighta printed too many copies out cuz one of the machines wasn't working so I tried printing on it again. That thing was prolly spittin' paper out 9to5 style!

UPDATE

2006-05-20T09:17:00.000-04:00

For those of you that have been entranced with Duane's hypnotic nostrils (or nosses as I like to call them), I am sorry.
It's time for an updated posssst.
We have been busy, busy, busy with getting the house ready to sell.
Packing some things, painting, selling items, throwing away crap, bringing crap to Goodwill, painting, moving furniture, etc.
I ain't no Bob Vila and after all this, I DEFINITELY don't give a shit about owning a home again.
I am just biting at the bit to move now and secure an awesome art-type job (see: Jen, Steph, Mel).
Applied online for a job in Jacksonville which would be a commute for me every day, but sounds really good.
We shallllll seeeee.
Not much new here to report.
Didn't realize but Art School Confidential was playing here all last week but was too busy to see it.
Popped into the theater yesterday at the AMC to see it.
My two cents: Not as good, funny or well-acted as Ghost World, but definitely a good film. Didn't know how they were gonna work the campus strangler into the plot but they did nicely. Only me and one other guy in there. Older gentleman who wanted to be my friend after it was over, following me into the urinals and all afterwards. I was talking to Rachel on my cel waiting for the movie to start and told her when he came in he was gonna be a doozie.
Damn I am psychic.
I ran to my car.
Then D and I went to see Poseidon (sp?) and got to watch Fergie get wet alll over.
And not by the yellow stuff.
That bitch got douched by a giant tidal wave.
D and I really liked this movie (not that I would own it or anything), but, the action was fast-paced and it had some cool stunt sequences.
Best parts: Fergie looking up and getting douched.
Boat captain telling crew to hold on he hears something, grabs his binoculars, looks out, and you can see a big tidal wave in his binocular lens (funny as shit like a cartoon).
Richard Dreyfuss wearing an earring and calling another male character "honey". Oh geez.
The blatant racist overtones: every hispanic character eats it in gruesome and brutal ways. It was so damn squirm-inducing. All the whiteys make it.

Happy Birthday Baby D!

2006-05-02T09:11:00.000-04:00

A blast was had this past weekend in Skavannah with all the peeps.
I hope everyone got home safely, etc and are back to their routines with a smile on their face.
Today is my boy D's birfday and I just wanna give a big shoutout to him.
I am sure he will be getting a very big Bronx Cheer from the lovely people at his workplace today.
Don't get any on your face, D.
Happy Birthday, baby!

Ah...The Sweet Memories...

2006-04-25T16:33:00.000-04:00

Remember those cupcakes Mel was taunting us all with on her blog not too long ago?
Well guess what?
Trav consumed about half a baker's dozen while visiting The Sikorski residence this weekend with my boy D in tow.
Those damn confections have gone down da hatch and ain't comin back. They Lost. No numbers are bringing their sweet asses back.
An they were goooooooood too.
Big thanks to Bri and Mel for hosting us again this past weekend while D and I scoped for houses in Gainesville.
Mel came with that lovely day and we got our eyes full of some new homes being built in Gainesville, not to mention we finally got to see there was more to this town than a college.
It was really nice and we're looking forward to living there sooooon.
Speaking of looking forward to, is anyone looking forward to the fun about ta be had in Skavannah this weekend?
A large 40 is being spilt for those who won't be with us this year: namely Fanny, Laura and Stacy.
You all will be sadly missed. We will do a slow song in karaoke for yo asses.
Hope we see ya next year!

Happy Birtttthhhhhhhhdayyyyyyy Melly-Mel!

2006-04-15T10:45:00.000-04:00

Birthday shoutouts go out to my main girl from Montana today as it's the day she was birfed!
Mel, hope you have a fan-TAB-ulous day, today.
These birthday wishes are brought to you live from Roanoke, VA.
Ray, ma and everyone here all wish ya a happy "natal" day as you and Bri call it!
Get crunk, get drunk, and party hearty!
See ya soooon!

Ceiling Cat is Watching You...

2006-04-10T12:09:00.000-04:00

If you are posed with the question as to whether or not view the film "Date Movie", please decline it at alllll cost!
Whatta piece of shit! D and I took a trip to the Dolla Movie theater here in town and literally walked outta that turd not even halfway through. GODAWFUL!
In other news, we are getting ready to begin the eBay portion of our "sell everything" campaign here at Casa Blandford/Falligant. Click here to view our first item up for sale. Remember it?
"It's gonna be a BEAAARRRRRQUAKE!"
D thinks one of the pics (3rd one) will scare away any buyers, I tend to disagree.
I think it's pretty frikkin' funny.
I also leave you with a random pic I found online. I love this.

Spring Cleaning

2006-04-08T09:41:00.000-04:00

After the acceptance of the job in Gainesville, D and I are beginning to get stuff cleaned up here at the casa, which also means selling a bunch o' shit on Amazon.com and, eventually, eBay.
Whatever is left over, we are putting in Goodwill boxes and then possibly having a yardsale for all the cheap, southern-fried birds in Columbia.
This month is going to be busy for us, with every weekend meaning going out of town or whatevah. Then , after Sidewalk Arts, we plan on putting the house up for sale.
Then that means rearranging the house for people who come by.
Which REALLLY means Trav has to take all of his stuff down. No more speakers or watching DVDs in the den.
No more Freddy vs. Jason prop over tv.
Entertainment cabinet in den being sold.
Trav's horror toy collection upstairs being boxed, etc.
Hello? Is Travis still here?
I think I might be going through a loss of personality once the house is up for sale.
But are we really who we are because of the things we own?
If that's true, then I must be a serial killer.
But I digress...
In other news, I talked to my pal Joe in Cali and he won't be able to make it for Sidewalk Arts this year (I was hoping to get him to come up to meet everyone and to party with us.) It'll suck without ya, Weg, but another time, huh?
The big 3-0 is looming around the corner and now I am really taking a look at my life and accomplishments thus far. I need to get on the gun with my portfolio and website.
I think starting the other Myspace page for IBTrav Illustrations is a good start to get my work out to more people and also a good push for me to produce more current work for my portfolio.
Finally, (ending this free thought post), I bet you all would love to see a new site to play around in.
Witness the amazement known as Hot Ghetto Mess.
Enjoy!

Happily Departed

2006-04-04T17:12:00.000-04:00

As I stood in the new releases section of the DVD Department at Best Buy this morning (promptly at opening time), I noticed quite a few older men hovering near the area where there were brand new copies of Brokeback Mountain on DVD for sale.
I rolled my eyes and kind of negatively guffawed to myself and walked right up to get a copy.
Come on guys.
Who gives a shit? Be yourselves.
We're Here. We're Queer. Get used to it, right?
Started a conversation with a guy in his 50's who was gay and stuck in Columbia.
His partner was brought up here and doesn't wanna move.
He has a "lucrative" job at Verizon, he said.
I told him his partner could get any number of those "lucrative" Verizon jobs all across the country, why here?
The guy agreed and looked at me forlornly.
He said he is miserable here.
I seconded that emotion.
All I could offer was a "hang in there, you'll get out of here soon".
I couldn't resist though, and had to tell the man that I had a "get out of jail soon" card.
Duane and I plan on moving from Columbia once and for all.
We're moving to Gainesville, FL.
I saw the man was in pain but I couldn't hold back the utterance.
I am getting outta this SHITHOLE!
HALLELUJAH!
Duane has accepted a job at the VA hospital in Gainesville.
The move will take place in July probably and we are putting the house on the market here once we are back from Sidewalk Arts in Savannah at the end of April.
It's still kinda new in our heads right now and Duane is stressed, but we both know it's for the better and long overdue.
We can't wait.
Just had to share it with you all.
WE MOVIN'!!!!!

OBSSESSION

2006-03-19T12:58:00.000-05:00

Ok.
You could say I am obssessed.
Hi. My name is Travis and I am obssessed with uploading videos to YouTube.
This is the best thing ever and also a very addictive thing.
I want to share videos with the WORLD.
You all know me and I try to hold hostage anyone that will sit still to show them something on DVD, right?
Well now the WORLD is my hostage for movie clips!!!
It couldn't have been a better thing!
I search on the site for random stuff, and, if they don't have it, I upload it.
It's surprising how much stuff ISN'T on YouTube yet.
So much fun.
Check out my and Bri's pages. We uploaded some good stuff.
To the left of this post, you will see I heaved the Southern Brides feature in exchange for a direct link to my YouTube page. There, you will find a wealth of useless videos, all for your viewing pleasoooore.
On the Back-To-Earth note:
Laura had surgery this past Friday on her knee and she is doing ok. All monetary donations, flowers, candy can be sent directly to me. I'll make sure she gets 'em.
D and I are getting closer and closer to getting the hell up OUTTA this hellhole called SC. More details to come on that.
Nothing much else is new, so birds, enjoy the rest of your weekend and I leave you with a random clip.
Can ya guess who's in it?

Happy B-Day, Yo B!!!

2006-03-11T08:52:00.000-05:00

Today is a momentus day, as Jennifer K. Norwood was birthed.
A large shout-out and big birfday wishes to her today from Orlando, FL.
We here with Bri and Mel, and D has an interview for a job in Gainesville, FL and then West Palm Beach, FL coming up (we go home this coming Wednesday).
Anyways, back to our birthday girl.
Hope she has a great day today and a fab weekend. I know Fanny is there to kick it up another 20 notches, so you two birds cut a rug fo' us!
Finally Jen, just some words for you:
Lloyd says you and John have a free stay at his Honeymoon Suite at his lodge whenever you wanna use it (for your bday).
Secondly, Jackie says that she has sent you a complimentary basket of muffins. She said she would have to deliver them herself though (maybe in the form of a cross eyed beauty queen in a pink bikini), because the basket girl, well, "lost her head" recently!
HAPPPPPY BIRFFFFFDAY, JENNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!

Oh, Hollywood

2006-03-06T09:29:00.000-05:00

So, the Oscars are over and I have already posted on my Myspace blog about this, but the big upset for the night was Crash winning Best Picture over Brokeback Mountain.
Not that Crash doesn't deserve this distinction.
It was a very important film to get out there.
Brokeback was just a very important film to me.
To other gays out there.
I am stepping off the soapbox now in fear of rambling for PAGES.
Another upset was damn Reese Witherspoon winning Best Actress.
I know this category was slim pickins this year, but REESE WITHERSPOON?!?! The star of Legally Blonde 2 and crap like Just Like Heaven??!?! UGH!
I saw Walk the Line.
Not so good. She was being the same character she always plays, except THIS time, GASP!, she used her native Tennessee twang to capture the "country-ness" of June Carter.
Whooptee friggin doo.
Pure crap. Even her acceptance speech was wooden. Oh honey, you have really struggled through life, having a mom and dad who are a successful doctor and lawyer, being married to a superhot guy, and raising to cute, chubby little kids.
Maybe the fact that you are too PERFECT is what is your struggle in life.
Ah, how horrible.
Gotta love the musical performances too.
Dolly was awesome as always although her song wasn't much of anything.
That damn Crash musical number was TOO MUCH. I was laughing all the way through it.
Bri called when we got to the performance of 'Hard Out Here for a Pimp' by, ah, who gives a shit.
A buncha rappers in baggy jeans and sideways caps. Watching a ho strut her stuff next to lamp posts on the Oscar stage with Dame Judy Dench in the audience was good enough for me. I imagine The Dame raising the roof and pouring a 40 in the aisle for all the fallen Pimps out there.
Phillip Seymore Hoffman for Capote, Best Actor: Haven't seen the film. When they played his clip, PSH was doing his best Mickey Mouse impersonation in a suit and tie. Breathtaking. I doubt the real person he was portraying sounded THAT MUCH like a nasally cartoon character and threw his hands around all crazy-like.
Heath Ledger ain't Deniro, but I would have liked him to have won Best Actor if they snubbed Brokeback for Best Picture.
Ah, well.....
What do I know?
It was just nice for important films to be recognized this year.
Ones that aren't just period pieces or about pianos and their tortured players. That shit gets old.
In recognition of crazy Hollywood, I post the following video below.
I think it is fabulous and is what I call HARD HITTING JOURNALISM.
Get to tha trooof, girl!

Update!

2006-03-02T11:29:00.000-05:00

The weather here has been so nice lately that I have almost forgot where we're living.
As I type this, the clouds are starting to roll in.
Yep, I officially jinxed that notion.
Stream of random thoughts coming up:

Target has some good-ass cereals. Just went back today to their clearance rack and bought up 3 boxes of their Cherry Pecan cereal. Also got their white chocolate raspberry cereal too. Also, got some new Archer Farms bottled wata's too! Some bitchin' new flavas.
Amazon marketplace has been good to D and I lately. Have been selling books and dvds pretty frequently lately, makin' da casha.
While I been makin' da casha that way, I have been burnin da casha by gobbling up discount used DVDs online-Ray got me hooked on Strangers With Candy and I got em' all now. SUCH a damn good show. Movie should be out this summer-gotta see it. (Think they're making a box set of the show down the line too-dammit)
Doing some art. D has helped me make some bitchin' frames for my John Waters paintings which I shall be premiering here and on Myspace real soon. I actually ventured in the fabric store for these frames. (Mel, pick jaw up off floor).
I LOVE Myspace! I am an addicted junkie and feel like a 15 yr old girl again! tink tink
Back to art: I am trying to come up with a t-shirt design for the Buffy Track at this year's Dragon Con in Atlanta. GEEEEEEEEEEEEKy, yes. Am I wholeheartedly into it? But of course! So, SUCK IT!
Called back the library here in town to check up on the job I applied for and followed up previously on a month ago. They are still accepting apps. Fucking MAYBERRY here, people!
There is a light at the end of the tunnel of torture here though...more on that in a soon to be future post.

Finally, and most importantly: yesterday, I ALLLLMOST got myself to go outside walking. I cleaned up our front yard a bit and ALLLLLLLLmost decided to go for a walk. Key word being almost.

This concludes my random post for today.

Sayanara!

Don Knotts 1925-2006

2006-02-25T22:47:00.000-05:00

I hate to tell you all, but "Fuckin' Don Knotts" has passed away.
We shall all miss him and his cast of memorable characters. Barney, Furley, Mr. Limpet, Mr. Chicken, John Water's muse....etc, etc, etc.
He truly was "the coolest".

Links, Links, Links

2006-02-23T08:42:00.000-05:00

Hey.
Here's some links for today:
First up, I was on Data Lounge this morning.
PLEASE tell me this shit is a joke.....unbeWEAVEable!
Everyone was laughing their ass off at that crap!
Secondly, I snagged another opportunity to do a cover for The Free Times publication I do weekly Crime Blotter illos for.
Go here to check out the cover work. If you click on the cover, it'll take you to the article and another view of my cover art.
Hope all is well!
LATA.

Happy Bday, L!!!!

2006-02-21T16:00:00.000-05:00

After a harrowing visit for our girl, she is back home in ATL and trying to get better.
Yes, I am talking about today's bday girl herself, Laura.
She came to visit this past Friday and we drove her back home yesterday.
Our upstairs shower had a tussle with her and she slipped and damaged her knee.
She is home and on meds and will be in contact with her doctor this week.
More updates as they come in.
But, besides all that, she is having a BIRTTTTHHHHDAY today!
So happy bday, miss L.
At least we had some cake BEFORE the accident, right?
Don't party too hard.
Love ya!

Happy Valentine's Day!

2006-02-14T11:17:00.000-05:00

Hope all you lovers out there have a great, safe Valentine's Day.
Don't forget to use protection.
Unless you want buns in the oven, stretch marks, or a VD.
Also, beware of heart-shaped boxes on your doorstep that are warm and wet on the outside and smell rank.

Blessing and a Curse

2006-02-07T13:53:00.000-05:00

Murmurings from the cave, people.
Mucho tarde congratulaciones to Steph and Josh on their engagement!!!! Happy news for the week!
Shout out to Jen for her awesome design at the tshirt site!
Shout out to Joe and me being an absentminded jackass for being late in contacting him.
Shout out to Mel for getting her sewing projects off the ground and getting semi-paid from SCAD from her previous works!
Shout out to Laura, whom we look forward to seeing at the end of next week ("the countdown continues"!)
I have been immersing myself in painting here at the house on that John Waters series I hinted at earlier. Finishing them up but not quite done yet.
That meant watching all his films (just about) on DVD and listening to the commentaries, etc, then making screen caps of scenes, or taking photos of the tv, then printing out for reference.
I am feeling mucho filthy after this project but excited for everyone to see.
Also applied for a job here in Columbia that's art-related but don't wanna talk about it in danger of jinxing it.
On another note:
I will say that I am MOST upset at a recent event in my area (and yours too).
For the 1 or 2 of you out there that actually entered on of these stores, the Musicland chain(Media Play, Sam Goody, Suncoast) are closing a TON of their shops, mainly the Sam Goody's and Suncoasts.
These stores were my suppliers, my pushers. I would get my action figures and collectibles at the Sam Goodys and Suncoast here in Columbia.
As I come in today from making a trip out to the mall, I am sad to say, they are no more.
The 2 Sam Goodys and the only Suncoast here in Columbia are closing and now going through liquidation sales.
All of the Suncoasts in the state of SC are closing and a buncha Sam Goodys too.
Ok, it's not like you would ever consider buying a movie or music from these stores, where cds run ya like twenty bucks or movies almost cost damn thirty.
It's the toys, people.
No more Freddy fixations.
No more feeding of my Buffy binges.
If you listen closely, you can hear the large gasp and sigh of geeks like me EVERYWHERE.
Click on the Suncoast image below to see if these stores are closing in your area, then go there and get me something on sale in rememberance! Right now everything is like 20% off, but give it time, peeps and get out there and act like vultures, cleaning out these carcasses of stores!

...In a Sling!

2006-01-26T16:58:00.000-05:00

Ooooooooooooooooooo...
Someone got their ass handed to em' today on Oprah!

Yo B...uffy

2006-01-26T13:22:00.000-05:00

Wanted to post a new 2006 version of the Buffy image I did for my promo card a while back.
There was just something about the original that bothered me. Proportioning on her face, something.
Well, I have gone back in and fixed it up and altered some stuff in Photoshop.
It looks more like her to me now and a helluva lot better.
Hope you guys think so.
Ahh. I love this art thing.......I'm off now to do a John Waters painting!
Talk to ya later!

YEEHAW...

2006-01-25T14:23:00.000-05:00

Ok.
I have been doing myself an injustice.
Over the months (and almost year on the 31st) since I have ran this blog, I haven't used it to post my artwork.
This is gonna change.
Starting today.
This is just hot off the press, people.

I went and saw Brokeback Mountain with D in Charlotte almost two weeks ago and was smitten. A new movie for me to obssess about.
This damn flick was OFF THE CHARTS. I have been waiting for a story like this for YEARS.
It was great. It was tragic. It was not just a gay movie, but a movie about LIFE and LOVE, irregardless. You all need to check it out if you get a chance. You don't have any excuses...it's showing at a theater near everyone now!
Anyhoo-to get to the point-I did my latest piece based off Brokeback Mountain's imagery of doomed romance.
Lemme know what you all think about it.
I drew it out in pen and ink, scanned it into Photoshop and colored it digitally. It's a large piece. I scaled it drastically to get it on here.
Hope you all like it.

R.I.P. Sheriff Dullard

2006-01-25T08:33:00.000-05:00

This just in:

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Character actor Chris Penn, younger brother of Oscar-winner
Sean Penn, was found dead on Tuesday at an apartment near the Pacific Ocean in the Los Angeles suburb of Santa Monica, police sources said. No cause of death was immediately determined but there was no signs of foul play, the sources added.

We here at Total Experience feel this loss heavily as our beloved "Sheriff Dollard" from To Wong Foo and "Willard Hewitt" of Footloose fame has passed on.

Just today, folks, remember that it's Sheriff DOllard, with and "o", and not Dullard.

It was a misprint.

Come Back To The Total Experience, Travy-T, Travy-T

2006-01-24T11:13:00.000-05:00

Howdy folks!
Sorry for the long delay in posts!
I have been busy with artwork for my portfolio as well as for other things.
There are some "big ideas fo dis place", as Dolemite would say.
Total Experience, ala fellow blog, Wonderful Time, will be featuring weekly sidebar content, introducing old as well as new content for your viewing pleasure.
Be on the lookout in the continuing week on that along with new Travart!
BEST OF ALL! Jackie has been around the world, kiddies!
That's right!
Everyone's favorite dead drag demon, Jackie, has been to Disney!

Go here to Twisted Commune, to check out her carnival of carnage!
Thanks to Bri and Mel for capturing the haunting footage.
Don't forget to check out Bri's Wonderful Time to see B and Mel's recent report on the soon to be opening Expedition Everest ride at Animal Kingdom at Disney. Looks to be off the hooook.
Until later in the week, peeps.

Never In Yo Wildest Dreammmssssss!

2006-01-12T10:59:00.000-05:00

VERY LATE in saying a BIG CONGRATS to my pal Steph for landing a job at Mighty Fine Industries (don't know if it's called that, but I like the sound of it!)
Steph is now gonna be TOTALLY Rashashaaaaaa and will be steppin' on up in the world of design!
Now she can give the big heave ho to her old handlers...and tell em' to SUCK IT! SUCK IT HARD!
All of this celebrating deserves a nice Oprah audience pandemonium shot.
This goes out to you, Steph! CONGRATS girl! I knew someone would take notice of your talents! I know this'll be great for ya!

Also, thanks to Jen for the first ever photo of the Jackie doll in action! Below is Jen's unfortunate run-in with her paper doll-drag-queen-attacker!
Hope you made it out alive, Jen! Just take that crucifix with the knife attached to it and plunge it into your stomach to end it all! Llyod says thanks bytheway!

Heeeeere's Jackie!

2006-01-11T11:18:00.000-05:00

Hi ho everyone.
I am back from all the holiday travelling and such.
Hope you all are well.
We had a great time in Orlando and missed some of you guys that couldn't make it.
We partied, ate, drank (stress that word), did some fireworks, danced, drank, and watched some cool classic movies like Dolemite and a new one to alot of you, The Newlydeads.
We will have a special screening held in Savannah, GA when the group gets together for Sidewalk Arts this year but let's just say, Utter Classic.
All weekend we were acting out scenes from this wonderful cinematic achievement.
And, as promised, I am presenting you with the very first Jackie Paper Doll.
Jackie comes with his/her trademark outfits (the hot number he/she wore at the beginning of the film and the "lurking robe", complete with heels and tennies, for when jumping off a rock in slowmo is an option) and also some accessories (kitchen knife you can make appear in her hand, curtain rod for impaling someone through mouth, post-coital shenanigans, and a bottle of the bubbly, which started Jackie's descent into undead madness!)
Yes, this is a doll you can cut out, color, and dress up, this is one for you die-hard killer trannie fans out there!
Email me a pic of your doll and I will post it here on Total Experience! Have fun with it!
Hope you all enjoy it and please look for other dolls in the future such as Chris, Lloyd Stone, and some surprises along the way!
Click on Jackie Lurking below to download your very own Jackie paper doll.

Shave and a Haircut

2005-12-22T11:10:00.000-05:00

So's Trav's got a new 'do.
It is very short. I look military or like that crazy son from Nip/Tuck ('cept for the face, cuz he looks like a damn extraterrestrial).
The haircut would be great for summer, but notsomuch for right now. Now I am freezing my ass from head to toe, literally.
The new chick at my local Mastercuts or whatever buzzed me up.
I shoulda known when I didn't feel or hear and scissors snipping away at my minimal locks and just using the clippers that I was in for a chrome-dome look.
On another note: Duane and I are doing our Christmas thing tonight and I am leaving tomorrow for Roanoke/he for Kentucky.
Oh, my Thanksgiving visit was such a wondrous joy...can't wait for Christmas!

Two Opposable Thumbs Up

2005-12-17T09:54:00.000-05:00

Saw King Kong last night with D.
Very good.
Very long.
Didn't get up to pee once though.
Special effects were amazing. The sheer scope of Adrien Brody's schnoz on screen was the most extraordinary effect.
If it wasn't for the old Iranian guy behind us stomping the floor right by our ears or pushing the toe of his shoe between our seats when we turned around a couple of times, the ending woulda really gotten me.
I was all prepared.
But I didn't moisten up.
The movie had heart, like Brian would say and it was action packed.

Hell to tha NO!

2005-12-16T10:21:00.000-05:00

I wanna scream!
FOX is cancelling our weekly guilty pleasure here at home.
The show Reunion.

Granted, the acting's not really Emmy-amazingand the show is overly melodramatic to the point of laughter.
BUT, it's got a badass Breakfast Club/nostalgia vibe going for it.
And did I mention each ep is a year in the lives of 6 friends, leading up to 2005, to determine who murdered one of them? And did I ALSO mention each ep has period appropriate music from that year. Broken Wings, All I Want....ALL THE DAMN HITS!
Alas, that shitty network Fox, notorious for dropping shows like hotcakes, is dumping it.
The problem with this is that we will never find out who the murderer is. That was to be revealed in the final ep.
Those bastards won't air the remaining 12 eps. And they said there won't be a dvd release OR explanation of the missing eps. FOX, just air the remaining episodes. All you're gonna do is air COPS reruns and shit. Who wants to see more pimps and hos getting smacked against the hood of a cop car? I can go a block from our neighborhood and see that shit!
I am going to take a running leap and do a swan dive out of the second story window here in protest.
(Only problem is, no one is home in the neighborhood right now so my suicide attempt would be in vain. No audience).
BUT I DIGRESS!
Hope all is well with everyone and this week's Jive Term is act a foo.

Example: "When I heard FOX was cancelling the show Reunion, I had to act a foo".

Don't forget to check out my peeps' blog, Twisted Commune, here.

Return of the Jive Term Friday!

2005-12-09T15:09:00.000-05:00

It's commmiinnnnng to get you, Queenie!
The Return of the Jive Term Friday!
Ok, so it's a little later in the day but nonetheless, it's time for the Jive Term of da Week!
BIG, MAD props to Stacy for the Slang 2 Postcards, for which I might never have been able to start this ongoing feature at Total Experience.
Stac got me the first set of flashcards last Christmas and this Christmas, she blessed me with the gift of slang again this year! Wait'll you all get some of these. Even funnier than the first!
In honor of Stac, I am sending out this jive term from the brand new second set to you faithful readers.
This week's term is: pimp.
Don't forget to use it in a sentence this weekend! Have a good one...

Happy Birthday B!

2005-12-08T08:03:00.000-05:00

Happy Birthday shout outs today to my best friend, Brian. We've known each other for over 10 years now...damn we're gettin' old.
Hope you have a great day today! Blow out all yo candles like a good boy and make a big damn wish, and you just miiiiight get a bonus wit dat check!
Look forward to seeing you at New Years!
Below is a snapshot of Bri at an early age, enjoying one of his first birthdays at a Chuck E. Cheese in Orlando.
I think Chuck E. was giving him more than free tokens in that pic.

Potty Mouths

2005-12-07T08:48:00.000-05:00

My momma has always said I have a problem with my "potty mouth".
I guess I learned it growing up. She says I got it from my best friend Joe. I dunno.
ANYhoo-it's something, as an adult I am trying to control, like Dr. Banner's rage.
I was watching some John Waters movies and a documentary the last two days and I was noticing how the FCC regulates movie profanity and also determines how many F-BOMBS a movie can have. If you're movie has 1 "fuck" I believe, then you can pass with a "PG-13". If you have a character say "I wanna fuck", then your movie becomes beyond-"R" rated material and ventures into the "NC-17" areas.
I found a page today that is interesting. Click here to see it.
It shows the usage of the F-word in films and which films have used it the most.
Wouldn't you know at the top of the list is my good ol' Captain Spaulding and The Devil's Rejects.
I have to say, that, in the movie, the characters constantly saying "F this and F that" got on my nerves a little, but, overall made my filthy self feel right at home.
I would also like to end this post with a link solely for Steph (and possibly Laura if she remembers).
I stumbled across this link yesterday after visiting IMDB. Lemme know if you guys know what movie this is from...
Clue: NAUGHTY 2!

Christmas Spirit

2005-12-02T10:58:00.000-05:00

Ho Ho Ho Kiddies!
As you can tell, the Christmas spirit has wafted through Total Experience like an eye watering bathroom odor.
Duane had the tree up and stuff when I got back from my VA Thanksgiving Hell Visit and Bri and Mel have both decorated their blogs and home and so, well, I have been bitten with the Christmas bug.
Hope you all enjoy.
With the Christmas spirit, Trav also caught the Christmas Crud.
So I sit here in all my sloppiness at the computer, typing this.
I am not really in the mood for a Jive Term Friday. Hope that sits well with the 1 of you that looks forward to that each week.
I am also working on the look for Ray Ray's blog as well so her birds have something to chirp about for the holidays. So be on the lookout for a temporary holiday look for her blog too!
On my last note: I have some ideas for gifts for the following people and now I am sending out a plea to everyone else: GIMME SOME IDEAS FOR CHRISTMAS!
I have ideas from: Bri
Mel
Laura (still awaiting some more ideas)...
Now I need some idears from the rest of you. It's not like you're gonna be getting a new car. I ain't no O, ok?
But, I would like to hear some of your items on each of your lists, STAT! Who care if you've been naughty or nice, Santa T always delivers his girls and boys some great gifts (no socks, lumps of coal, or snowy white turds here).
Email me or post your lists on this here blog.
I'm waiting.
Ok....I am still waiting.
Get to it!
Have a good weekend ya'll!

Murrrry Chrruusssmass!

2005-11-28T18:30:00.000-05:00

Ok.
If nothing gets any of you into the Christmas spirit, then this news clip will.
When I got home yesterday, Duane had saved this for me on the DVR. We both have a heart, but SHIT this is funny.
Some of you may have seen this clip already, but, it is worthy of many repeat viewings. We were afraid we couldn't get it up on the blog without mucho xtra effort (which we thought wasn't worth it), until I found the clip on the local news' website.
Please wait after the lame-ass ad at the beginning and then watch the video, paying close attention to the figure that falls to it's knees and scrambles to pick up their weave on the floor of the Walmart entrance.
This is a video of people trampling one another to shop early day after Thanksgiving, this past week.
The sheer hilarity of this is heightened by the appearance of "Wanda". I don't know if this is her name, but damn the woman looks like a "Wanda".
What an amazing choice of hair she has chosen too. That weave almost gets her killed.
Watch the mayhem and then how the clip has an immediate cut to her crying with her wig shoved roughly back onto her head. You'd swear she was Queenie with those tears comin' outta nowhere. "Oh Dolemite, I'm so glad yo home".
Our hearts go out to "Wanda".
Thanks for the laugh girl.
Hope Santa brings you some Excedrin this Christmas season along with a brand new weave, girl.
Please click on the pic below of this year's biggest toy seller for the holidays: the Ghetto Barbie, to see the mayhem.
(The clip is in Windows Media format)

Sayonara, Miyagi-Son

2005-11-25T11:20:00.000-05:00

Fresh from a turkey coma, I awoke today to hear the sad news that Mr. Miyagi, Pat Morita, passed away in Las Vegas yesterday at age 73.
Let's all take a moment to pay tribute to da Wax On, Wax Off Masta!

Happy Gobble Gobble From the 3-Ring Circus

2005-11-24T20:38:00.000-05:00

I am coming to you live from the nuthouse known as my mom's apartment. Cousins are visiting and eating all the food. Brother has brought me to the point of picking up and leaving last night. Mom is currently in the other room preaching religion and the divorce between her and my dad and how MUCH it has affected my brother. What about me and Rachel?!?!?! YEESH! Sanity has left this place like, 5 years ago. I will be spending a day or so here for Christmas and I am outta here. Mom has lost it. FULLY. Her and Jake are complete INSANE PEOPLE!
I hate family get-togethers.
Hope everyone elses was less-eventful.
Gobble! Gobble!
PS- To all mofos! Duane and I were talking about a major get-together in Orlando this coming New Years! That means EVERYONE! We were talking about getting a house for rent or something for the New Year's weekend! My sis Rachel will be coming up now (after all the nuttiness) because she has a long Christmas break, so she will finally get to hang with everyone. PLEASE join us, chickens. It'll be a CLUCK-in' good time!

Gala Coverage

2005-11-20T13:14:00.000-05:00

This is Z Big T coming to you with coverage from this past Friday night's World AIDS Day Gala here in beautiful Columbia, SC.
It was a premiere event, with everyone arriving in elegant evening gowns, serving of wine, hors d'oeuvres, and art on display.

The writer and star of the HBO Films' Lackawanna Blues, Ruben Santiago-Hudson, was there to show his film at the benefit and the audience was enraptured. Duane and myself really enjoyed the film, and the older gentleman behind us showed his interest and appreciation for the film by snoring loudly through 2/3 of the entire showing. Ah. Class.
I was there to help premiere a new series of posters for the local SC/HIV Council that I illustrated. The reaction of the attendees was very positive and Beverly Smith, my contact at the agency, touted me to everyone that stopped at our table. A lot of people walked away with my promotional mailer in their hands.
There was a band playing at a post-reception after the film, and a looong line for the late evening food. D and I slipped out after saying our goodbyes and ended our wonderful night out on the town with a drive thru at Wendy's where the hollow-eyed attendant gipped us on our fries.
Magic, indeed.

Warm Fuzzies

2005-11-19T22:47:00.000-05:00

Yo peeples.
Back from a day of errands and getting ready fo' bed, I just wanted to post this pic D took of me this morning.
After reading Jen's blog, it looked like we both had the same idea.
The pic is of me sporting the COOLEST damn scarf from none other than my pal Steph Lehman that she sent me last Feb or so. I too, like Jen, am just now posting a pic of the fruits of Steph's labor.
Thanks my dear! It was colder than a witch's tit in a brass bra today and that scarf came in handy girl. Can't you tell by my face? You woulda thought I was living in Antartica and shit. I had on like 10 layers. But I looked scorching hot so that's all that mattered.
I think my scarf will be travelling with me to Roanoke, VA this Thanksgiving too! So thanks again to my pal Steph, for my first scarf EVER!
Before I go, I have to leave you with this warning: do not be fooled by the recent mouthwatering ads you may have seen, the new Lobster Lasagna at Macaroni Grill ain't all that.
Kinda gross actually.
I will be posting tomorrow.
Until then....nite.

Jive Term Friday, Yo

2005-11-18T08:59:00.000-05:00

This week's Jive Term kiddies is Dime Out. Hopefully no one has been dimed out recently. If so, you betta take that shit to tha streets and beat the crap outta whoever dimed you out.
Some more rambling before the weekend:

Has anyone seen My Name Is Earl on NBC? That shit is too funny. I recorded a block of eps last weekend and just got to finishing them up this morning. That show is awesome. Why is it that tv shows are, like, TEN TIMES better than movies these days? I remember seeing the preview for My Name Is Earl at the theater at the end of last summer and that shit was more entertaining than any other trailer or even the feature. Whatta damn shame. I blame the drought of John Waters, Chucky, Freddy, and Jason pics not flooding the market right now. A damn shame.
Tonight is the big shindig for World AIDS Day where my posters will be "unveiled". Not looking forward to this at. all. #1 don't llike big hootenannies like this. #2 Don't like to dress up (unless it involves me wearing my Michael Myers Peeing on Jason Hockey Mask tshirt and jeans). Maybe this is why I love Earl so much...
I am thinking of starting a new feature on this blog similar to Oprah. I want to make everyone do better in their lives. I am inspired. Maybe I'll make you all save spare change that you find in your sofas, bottoms of your cars, etc. Maybe I will just have you each do a good deed a day and then post on here what you have done. Maybe we should all build a house for the homeless or something. More breaking news on this idea a little later...
I am also wanting to redesign the Twisted Carnival blog for use all year round. New banners. New look. Etc. I kinda want it to be a surprise so I am not gonna divulge my idears on here just yet.
Gotta figure out the quickest and best way to get to Rachel's college Tuesday. Duane, the Master In Commander of Directioneering (is that a word?) will help me with a map to chart my voyage into hicksville to get Ray. Can't wait. All I have to say is that I finally downloaded the last two COVETED tracks from the Bea Arthur on Broadway soundtrack off Limewire and I am so damn happy. I'll be playing that shit on the way up to get Ray. Bea Arthur's the bomb and I STILL kick myself for not going to see her in Savannah when that show came through town. Damn you Hyatt and me for stressing myself out too much at that job to get tickets!
Ok, confession: Bri, I haven't sent out the remaining pics of Steph's on cd yet. I PROMISE I will very soon. I'm a slack-ass. I also have to record a bunch of Rachel's Gilmore Girls and Arrested Development eps on VHS but I don't feel like it yet. So Ray, you may not get them for Thanksgiving. I just look at it this way: when can you watch them? You don't have a VCR at school, and, I don't think you'll get to them during Thanksgiving with the damn cousins coming in for the holiday, so, wait it out. How bout' for Christmas?
After Thanksgiving and back home here, there will be some serious job looking and talks with D about VA openings and where they are. The dream of Orlando is slipping away slowly. Everyone say a little prayer that there will be an opening there. (Ok, I know you don't pray, but do it for this one thing DAMMIT!)
Also, just hitting the net this morning, the new Superman trailer. Pretty badass. Go here on JoBlo to see it. It's in glorious Quicktime. For those of you that don't have it, there's a guy in a blue suit and a red cape. He's pretty damn hot. Anyways, he flies and stuff. Get someone with Quicktime to tell you about it.And while on the topics of links, check out this movie poster contest on Worth 100. Pretty cool.

Enough rambling. Travy-T's gotta go get a haircut with my ghetto girls at Hair Cuttery. I'll tell em all you say hi. Then off to the Value Brakes to make an appointment for tomorrow to have the cars' brakes looked at. Then to the bookstore to peruse the magazine rack and pick up the People's Sexiest Men Alive issue. (I always look forward to that. Tee hee. It's like my personal Tiger Beat for the year).Chat you bitches up later. Have a great weekend.

The Emancipation of Travy-T

2005-11-17T20:40:00.000-05:00

HALLELUJAH!
I am finally finished with the 9-poster series for the SC HIV Council. It was a long, arduous road, but it's done.
At the last minute, I had to change 2 images and so, out of 9, I really like 7. Tomorrow night is a big World AIDS Day benefit. They are holding a screening of the film Lackawanna Blues and the writer and star of the film will be talking. There will be a pre and post reception and it will be really Ra-Sha-Shaaa. More pics to follow on that. I was telling D I really don't have anything nice besides my badass t-shirt collection, so, I will have to improvise with some semi-classy old things I have lying around in the closet. So about the benefit, my posters will be showcased there. I hopefully don't have to do dick but just show up with Duane and enjoy the evening and talk to my friends from the HIV Council. Down the line, it would be super-cool badass if the posters got national attention, but, for right now, they will be used here in SC for AIDS awareness.
It was a long, long road to finishing these posters. I don't think I would have gotten through them without my good friends Madge (or Esther), Mimi, and the Goddess herself, Oprah.
You see, this past Tuesday was like a powerhouse Tuesday for purchases from Trav. The new Madonna cd came out, a special, super extended, shameful double dip version of Mariah's recent cd, and finally, after months of waiting by me, the Oprah Winfrey 20 yr Collection DVD set came out. I am in Estrogen Hog Heaven and have been since Tuesday.
Firstly, the Madonna cd is off the hook. This will definitely be replayed a gaJILLION times in my cd player like Gwen's last November. Madge is definitely a wackjob in real life lately (aging is making her more insane I think), but this album is her best since Ray of Light. No palates rap in here. There is the use of the word "dork" in a song that is pretty damn embarassing though...
Now, Mimi has emancipated me from my money again, but I am shameless, bitches, shameless. Ask Bri. I am a filthy fan and I purchased the new edition of her recent cd. It has some new tracks which are pretty damn good and also has a DVD with her videos and an unreleased overseas video for my fave track on the album.
Finally, I have been mesmerized by the big O for the past few days. The tears, the Wildest Dreams, the twats in the audience lookin' like they're gonna explode. Duane came home today while I was curled up on the sofa and told me I was watching my Oprah porn. I told him that's correct, and proceeded to show him a scene. "Here comes the money shot" I said as the camera slowly closed in on O's face and she went into her self-titled "ugly cry". That bitch has a trance on me. I LLLLUUUUUVVV her. And it IS like watching porn cuz I had a box of Kleenex beside me today at all times watching the DVDs.
Anyways, long art project over, so cool tunes to listen to (the greated hits of Alanis Morrissette is great too-her cover of Seal's CRAZY is off the hook), and my O on DVD has made for an enjoyable week.
Sorry I have been MIA for the last couple of weeks, but, I will try and update more. I go to pick up Ray Ray at college this coming Tuesday and then home for the holidays. Poor Duane has to stay here and work. I am bummed I won't be spending the holiday with him for yet ANOTHER year, but so is the nutty politics of our families and the non-acceptance, blah blah blah.
Bri-thanks for calling me today to checkin. I will be in touch with you soon.
Laura-thanks for calling today checking in too. Glad to hear you have some time to yourself. (and Harry Pooter this weekend).
Fanny-thanks for the help online this week. Be in touch soon.
Jen, Steph and Josh-whut up my niggas! Steph and Josh: don't rent anymore L Word and rent Boo! and tell me that's NOT the haunted hospital Josh was telling us about! UnCANNY!
Joe-Good talking to you last week. Thanks for the call.
Jason-I will get in touch with u via email 'bout those feta sketches. Congrats on the radio show. I will put up a link on this blog with the feta image once we have one worked out.
Back tomorrow with a jive term!
Peace out bitches.....time to go discuss with Duane the outcome of tonight's episode of Reunion on FOX. That shit is ADDICTIVE!

Better Late Than Never Jive Term Friday!

2005-11-11T17:23:00.000-05:00

Hello faithful readers.
I'm a little late to da game today, but here is your Jive Term of the Week to take you through your weekend.
It's getting cold kiddies, so I hope you all bundle up and enjoy your weekends!

On my end...still working on that HIV poster project/campaign! All the posters are due by next Friday, not today, as I previously thought, so I have a little longer to procrastinate and to come up with some brilliant ideas and illustrations!
Don't forget to try out this week's jive term on friends and loved ones!
Until next time...

Hi Ho, Hi Ho...

2005-11-08T22:27:00.000-05:00

Hello friends.
I have been MIA (cool name for a music group, eh Jen?) for a little bit due to work on those SC HIV posters I have been telling you all about. It's been going pretty well but just a HELLUVA lot of time being spent.
I found out the even they will be presented at is not until NEXT Friday, the 18th. A nice sigh of relief for me, but, I am sure I will still need to have all 9 of these suckers done pretty much by the end of this week if it's off to the printers...
So, anyone come up with a CONCEIVABLE plan for the commune deal? I am all fo' that.
In other breaking news, Duane fixed collards tonight (collard greens), and I actually ate some. For people in the family, they know that the faint SMELL of greens makes me gag and dry heave. These things were pretty damn grrrreat when D fixed em'.
Only problem is, I feel them working their magic and the tidy bowl is calling. YOWZA!
Til next post.....

Jive Friday

2005-11-04T08:24:00.000-05:00

Since missing it last week, *sorry all of you who weren't visiting us for Halloween festivities*, the Jive Term of Da Day is back in full force. This Friday's term is ghetto.

As in: Columbia has the most ghetto movie theaters I have ever seen.

Make sure you use it in a sentence today.

This jigga be off to work on some illustrative stuff. Peace out muthafuckas. Til' next post....

The Last Supper

2005-11-02T22:16:00.000-05:00

Fear not mere mortals (and Jason), I am back.
The Halloween holiday is gone and so is the Halloween decor' on this blog.
The fun is over.
All our good friends are home safely and only remnants of the Twisted Carnival remain.
I'm kinda sad. It was too fun and ended too soon. I would start an 80's clap for the event, but I don't have everyone to join in clapping with me. Or to join in a nice "uuuuhhhhhhhuuuunnnnhhhhhhhhhhhh" or "BABY!...you so ugly you stop this motion pictcha frum runnin'!"
We had a blast and hope you all did too. Thanks for making it a great time everyone and for coming out.
There will be Flickr pics soon enough for this year's Halloween festivities at our place in Columbia, SC.
Above is one of our "family meals" together while the gang was here.
Enjoy.

Happy Birthday Ray, You Sizzlin' #7!

2005-10-23T19:30:00.000-04:00

Due to a short deadline freelance project, this urgent announcement is being made late in the day.
Happy Birthday to Miss Maggotus herself, aka #7, aka Ray-Ray, aka Rachel my lil' sis.
I know she has THOROUGHLY enjoyed her Roanoke visit this past weekend and is really bummed out she has to return to school.
Hope you had a great bday today, you filthy F!
Love you!

Jive Friday!

2005-10-21T12:21:00.000-04:00

Today's Jive Term relates to what has been on my mind this past week: friends coming to visit! From all different areas of the US! Here's hoping you all travel safely and get to us in one piece! Can't wait to see you!
Today's Jive Term is : Trip.

I will use it in a sentence today: I hope I don't trip over all the work I have let pile up over the last week.

And with that, I am off to work on a freelance project I got here locally for a design firm. Yay me! This weekend will be devoted to me cleaning the upstairs of the house and getting some more work done on outside decor' for the Halloween festivities! Later!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Quick update!!! Chyna says to have a great weekend!!! GOD knows she knows how to have a good one! Hoooowwwaaaaaaaaaard!

Snapshots of Our Lives

2005-10-15T21:31:00.000-04:00

As promised, above is a link to Flickr where you can view some imagery from our recent trip to Orlando and Universal's Halloween Horror Night 2005.

It was a great time had by all. And if you look above, you will see Duane turned into a blue HULK because the line for one of the haunted houses was TOO DAMN LONG!

DUANE SMASH!

(click D's pic above to go see the new pics!)

Home Alone -AAaaargggghh!

2005-10-14T15:13:00.000-04:00

Back from Orlando and now home alone here, slapping my face in the mirror and coming up with inventive ways of fighting off crooks with my toy collection.
D and I had a GREAT TIME in Orlando and are now back home gearing up for the Halloween festivities with our pals!
We were really happy that this year Bri joined us on our yearly trek to Halloween Horror Nights at Universal Studios. We had a blast and I can report this year, I didn't jump in the laps of anyone out of fright. I wasn't scared that much. I am growing. Becoming a man here.
It's time to bring you today's Jive Term.
Today's term is inspired by our trip to Orlando. *Special thanks to Bri and Mel for their hospitality! It was great seeing you guys and can't wait to hang in a couple weeks. Also, to Stac. Great to see you again my dear and we look forward to your visit.* The Jive Term be Dope, as in "This year's Orlando trip was dope".

A Flickr photo post to come soon of our trip....keep your eyes peeled!

Term Friday

2005-10-07T12:24:00.000-04:00

Alright bitches.
This is the third post in a row. Jealoussss?
Can't believe I dun it.
Duane and I are leaving for Orlando this afternoon and are SUPER psyched!
Laura-don't murder anyone at work. The dumpster out back IS the best place to stuff a corpse if you succumb to the voices.
Jen-Hope you get your laptop issue worked on. Damn! Congrats on the credit card!
Steph- I think I had a dream with you in it last night. Nothing too exotic. Pretty normal. But I woke up thinking of you today. Hope it's not some psychic link and you are pinned under a truck somewhere.
Joe-I got your message last night on the phone. Duane could hear it from the earset. He was freaked. Me, I just know it's normal.
Ray-Tell em' to TAKE THIS JOB AND SHOVE IT today! Go for it Norma Rae! I wanna know how it goes!
Fanny-I haven't gotten in contact with ya on AIM lately, but I am comin' your way. Maybe we can get together while D and I are in Orlando!
Bri and Mel-out with one set of guests and here comes some more down the roadway! Get ready! Smoker grill in back and all!
Stacy-Hope you've had some rest, you damn vixen! We gonna party HARD! (I'm bringing you some Betty cd materials-my best YET!)
I leave you all with today's Jive Term of Da Day!
Today's term is WORD.

I will use it today in a sentence.
"We be going to Orlando to hang with our peeps. WORD!"
Peace out playas.
I will try and update while we are in Orlando with Bri and Mel....
Until next time.......

Don't Go Into Shock...

2005-10-06T18:51:00.000-04:00

...yes, there is a second post! In a ROW!
Duane and I are excited as hell to be leaving tomorrow afternoon to head to Orlando to see Bri, Mel and Stacy and to forego in our yearly tradition of attending the Halloween Horror Nights at Universal Studios.
This shit is gonna be awesome! Bri is going with Duane and I and Stacy (the usual trio) this year and it is gonna be so damn fun!
I just posted up some pics on Flickr from last year's trip. Check em out here.
Other news, SCAD emailed today about a contest for their upcoming Blood Drive with the American Red Cross or something. It's Halloween themed, so you know my ass went into overdrive today to do up some art for it. Ya get 50 bucks, a copy of the poster and tshirt ur artwork will appear on.
Check out my submission below. Whattya think?

Finally, last night Duane and I were woken up at 3:30 in the morning to the doorbell ringing. Ok.
Dark outside. Our windows open. The trickle of rain in the bushes outside. The doorbell continuing to be rung.
Duane jumping up and saying loudly "What's That?!?!"
I whispered back "That's the killer outside our front door that just heard you here in the bedroom. Thanks."
I looked through the blinds and saw a cop car.
Damn it was like an ep of CSI or something. Nothing good happens this late and a cop is outside our door.
Thought they were gonna tell us a fugitive is hiding in our upstairs bedroom or something.
The kind cop at the door told us that they received a 911 call that someone hung up in the middle of and it came from the phone number registered to our place. We told him we both have cel phones and no longer have a LAN line.
So, poor bastards who aren't registered with the city with their phone number were probably being bludgeoned to death in their living rooms by some homicidal maniac while the cop was standing in our doorway, staring at two half naked men in shock. Wonder what the hell he was thinking.
Bet I will be drawing the outcome of that 911 call in the blotter next week.
See you tomorrow!

R-r-r-random

2005-10-05T18:31:00.000-04:00

What's up my jiggas?

Today is some random shit....hope ya don't mind. I have a list too. This is a list of shout-outs to everyone I wanna make today. Bear wit' me, ok?

Rachel (aka Maggotus): Hope you feel better if you're getting sick. Kick that damn roommate and her bf out of your room so you can rest or I'll be there with a damn chainsaw!
Joe: Good to hear that you are still out there and you are busy makin' that money. Go boyee!
Laura: Glad to hear you are ok, although you are suffering from the same Shit-itus I have been feeling (aka-case of the harumphs)
Bri: Can't wait to see you and Mel this weekend! I figured out how ta do the transparent gif thingy after I talked to you yesterday....one less thing for you to have to show me when I'm up.
Mel: Hope you are enjoying your ma and sis. I hear there were lots of excursions. Excursions to stores, flea markets, more stores, prolly' pottery stores......uuugggghhh (I am fashioning a noose out of an old tie now!) J/k! Hope you are having fun with them!
Stacy: I am bringing up yo' Betty Badass 3: Betty Meets the Blues covers to you this weekend. Duane and I may still be up for a little Disney Halloween fun......we'll tawk.
Jen: Good luck wit yo' damn laptop.......crazy shiiiiit. Tell em' they better screw it right, or they're F*#&ed!
Steph: I am lovin' your art that you are posting on your site. Notice in your mailbox you haven't gotten any correspondence from Jerry Orbach.....he may be paying you a visit when you're up in a few weeks. Look under your pillow and shit...
Jo: What's up wit you, girl? Is Fanny fine? Is she doin' alright? I will be in touch with you soon enough. Forgive me for not being on AIM lately.....it's been on the fritz fo' a little while cuz we installed a new program on the computer. It's up and running now tho-I'll look for ya.
eBay Customers: Thanks for bidding on my shit and ultimately funding my DVD habit. I love you guys!

I think that about covers it all.

Oh! Here is a random pic of King Kong from the new movie. Just felt like posting it cuz it looks tiiiiiite considering it's CG and shit.

And a big sniff sniff to Jessica Simpson and her meathead hubby Nick for their recent split. Like we didn't see that shit happening. I love it! LOL!

Here is a link to a funny-ass cartoon online. Don't watch it if you are at work. It's got sound and some scary sights! It's also voiced by Amy Sedaris, Rachel and pals! Go here to check it out.

Here is a little preview to get you all in the Halloween spirit. Wait for the graphics and shit to load on the site. And they said this movie was a "classic"! I love it! This has got to be one of the lamest trailers ever! I love the voiceover though....

Finally, I am posting a link to an artist's website who I discovered today and am really impressed with. It's a husband and wife team and I LOVE their kooky imagery! It is SO AWESOME. Check out the site of Brandt Peters and then the site of his wife, artist Kathy Olivas. Their stuff is wacky, a little bit nutty, and a WHOLE LOTTA kooky! (PLUS it's sick and twisted!)

Trick or Treat?

2005-10-01T00:35:00.000-04:00

Hello there, fiends!
As you faithful readers will notice, there have been some cosmetic changes to the blog.
Fret not rabid fans, these changes are only temporary.
My favorite holiday is Halloween, so, for the month of Shocktober, look for new banners,topics, and a new "look" to Trav's Total Experience.
Let's all celebrate a spooky, fun, and creative month, shall we?!?
Ah....the smell of caramel apples, fall, and the faint aroma of flaming bags of poop on doorsteps....yes, it's Halloween!

Term Time!

2005-09-30T10:23:00.000-04:00

Hey kids!
Back from the germ infested trials and tribulations of cold warfare here at the Total Experience offices these last couple of weeks, the postings are back!
Did you miss the Total Experience while we were gone? Hope so. We sure missed you.
It's Friday folks and you know what that means......
Today's Jive Term of Da Day is....MACK.

If you love someone, call them this today. If you are impressed with someone's antics, then use it to tell them so today.

You Know What Time It Is Kids...

2005-09-23T14:44:00.000-04:00

It's.... JIVE TERM OF DA DAY!
Thanks to all my faithful little readers for waiting in anticipation......Uncle T's internet provider has been a real pain in that ass. Not to mention Big Uncle T has been down for the last couple of days with a cold.
Without any further ado, today's term is: DOWN.

When you are hooking up with friends or acquaintances this weekend to go do something, make sure you throw in this term that's SURE to secure your "Street Status".

Jive Term O' Da Day

2005-09-16T10:20:00.000-04:00

Welcome to the start of a new feature here at Trav's Total Experience, Jive Term O' Da Day.
Today's Jive Term O' Da Day is : KEEP IT REAL. Below, you will find the pronunciation of the word, the definition, and synonyms.

Commit it to memory. Try using it in a sentence today. You will amaze friends and family this weekend! We here at Trav's Total Experience are educating whiteys, one honkey at a time.

A Promise To Keep I Have

2005-09-15T17:34:00.000-04:00

So, I haven't been updating this here blog with new posts on a regular basis.
I am going to make amends to change this.
Starting tomorrow, and from every Friday now on, there will be a new feature here at Trav's Total Experience.
It's gonna be called Jive Term of Da Day.
We here at the blog want you, the reader, to become more educated and well-read.
If you are a fan of this site, you obviously don't know proper English or read any books of any kind.
You are also pretty pampered in your own Suburban world.
We want to break you free of the limits of poor education. Shatter the fear of "urbanization".
We are ALL God's chillrenz.
Yes fellow readers, we are going to get you HOOKED UP with some words that you can use on a daily basis.
Impress your friends. Stump your coworkers. Fit in with the "urban" demographic at your local market or traffic light.
You will be DOWN with it.
Are you hip?
Can you dig it?
Well get down ON it.
Tomorrow at Trav's Total Experience.

Ok, Who Got Gas?

2005-09-14T21:32:00.000-04:00

"My daddy owns a gas station!"

Who wants to murder this kid?

Show of hands?
I am lucky enough to not be like a lot of you right now who need to drive quite a bit for work, school, etc, but DAMN if gas prices haven't really screwed with my life too.

I know we are some lucky people right now compared to others in other parts of the US, but here continues my superficial rant:
I normally am a hermit at home, never leaving the house during the day, squinting like a vampire at any stream of light hitting my sensitive retinas, but, when I wanna go out, I wanna go out.
Next weekend is a movie festival in Durham, NC. They are showing my fave movie of all time, The Monster Squad. I have never seen it on the big screen. Granted, a nutball like me would be the sole person to drive the 3 hours plus to see it, but I would like my options open, thank you.
Not with gas prices the way they are. I can say HELL TO THA NO to those plans.
Now I know they have gone down quite a bit from a few weeks ago (at that time, Duane and I were sitting in my car at the gas station in a huge line for like 20 minutes waiting to get that last expensive drops of gasoline into my tank). Pure madness. It was like Armageddon. Or like Red Dawn. Except I didn't see Swayze. Or Grey.......but I digress.....
I guess this post is about being couped up and becoming stir crazy.
I wanna feel like I can leave the house if I want to. Without watching dollar signs trail behind the car as I go from point A to point B.
Guess I will just have to stay inside and just make some more banners for this site.....
(I think I am on like # 33 now...don't feed the addiction, don't feed the addiction....CHK- CHK...BOOM!)

Shall. We. Play. A. Game.?

2005-09-07T16:48:00.000-04:00

Normally if I see stuff online, it rarely makes me wanna post it on here for others of you to see. Especially if I think it's nothing any of you would give a crap about.
I am a big geek and enjoy video games alot. Now I know most of you aren't into video gaming, but this is pretty damn cool. It's so "different" , that you just have to hear about it.
This new game is called Stubbs the Zombie in Rebel Without a Pulse, and it's coming out October 19 or so for XBOX, PC and MAC.
There is a trailer for the game that you must check out now by going here. (Make sure you have Quicktime and also make sure you are not at work or at least can sneak a quick peek. It's kinda gruesome. In a fun, comically twisted way.)
Isn't that trailer dope? It's got me so psyched to play.
If you all are coming to our place for Halloween this year (and I can sell some mo' shit on eBay), you best be bringin' yo' brain munchin' skillz with you, cuz we gonna be playin this game, hooked up to the stereo and shit.
There's so many goodies to look at on the main website. Go to it by clicking the pic below. There's even a soundtrack to the game, a bunch of old pop standards sung by punk and rock groups of today. Pretty chill, eh?
That's all I got fer today...I'm audi.

Let's Get Random/How I Spent Summer Vacation

2005-09-06T11:45:00.000-04:00

Ok, here's a bit of randomness for you all.
Can't ever say we don't got no entreprenuers here in Columbia.
Check out the Business ad to the left.
Some crook's selling his shit in the paper as "business equipment".
Damn. The economy is getting bad if criminals be selling their wares.
I don't know about you, but I need some Curtis guns and door opening tools at my workstation at work.
We already have enough staples and paperclips.

D told you about our recent Myrtle Beach excursion. Now it's my turn.
Friendly South Carolinian people? Malls that didn't have THUG written all over them? Planet Hollywood? Hard Rock Cafe? House of Blues? Hooters? (ok, so we have that one here in Cola).
Toto, we sure ain't in SC no mo'!
Not true! Myrtle Beach IS in SC and it's a helluva lot different than most areas I have been to. It's very touristy. VERY. But it's nice.
We stayed in a nice hotel not too far from the beach. We went to one of those time share talks. The people were nice at first. Free doughnuts, drinks. We listened to the speal. We toured the properties. Everyone was friendly. Then we saw them devolve slowly. At the third stage of us turning down the sale, the third person we were sent to looked down his old wrinkled nose at us and sent us off to collect our $50 gift certificate to House of Blues.
Thanks sucka! At least we weren't like the other people there who do this shit for a living. You could tell they were gonna get therez! They gots their lists of friend and family to sign them up for this so they could get a free vacation to Hawaii and shit, they marched up to the desk to collect their freebies, then they walked out without so much as an eye blink. Ah. My heroes.
Now, above you will see the ticket to one of the most HILARIOUS cheapie tourist attractions in Myrtle Beach. There was an Alligator Zoo that looked pretty cheezy-E, but this one took the cake. Plus, we payed money to see it.
It's Ghosts and Legends of the south or some horseshit. You pay like 8 bucks each and go into this room made up to look like Booker T Washington's log cabin or some shit. You can see wires attached to the knick knacks laying around. There was only 1 other couple that was in there with us, sitting on the uncomfortable benches.
It was a 20 minute show. And BOY! Whatta show! Just look at the image above. Doesn't that insight fear and excitement? Fear not for your faithful blogger, dear friends, he made it out alive. And yes, Brian, he did jump once towards the end. The music was LOUD, the objects moved with very visable wires, and even a mop with a hat and coat slowly creaked out of an open window on the stage at the end. Anticlimactic doesn't even begin to describe this debacle. Basically, the show was about souther ghost stories and we were treated to loud booming "southern fried" vocals being spat through little speakers hidden in the room and watched as a spotlight highlighted the said "animated objects". Whatta fuckin' hoot! Anyhoo-enough rambling bout that. The ticket just cracks me up cuz they make it look like a friggin scare-a-thon thrill ride. PRICELESS.

Another thing we experienced while we were in Myrtle Beach was one of the cheesy Celeb Impersonator shows. I was DYING to see how funny one o' these were.
Duane was up for some fun too, so, much to my luck, one of the shows was featuring Janet Jackson.
To the pic on the left, we have the "stars" of our show. Can you guess which one was Miss Jackson If You're Nasty? Also, take a guess at who the other numbers are while you're at it.
To be honest, the people were good, even if the place the show was at looked like the Hee Haw barn. And most of the impersontators didn't look a THING like the stars they were emulating, it was fun.
I was getting up and clapping and dancing to the beat, laughing and carrying on in the audience. Duane was laughing too. I was totally trying to make it seem like I was at a real concert and was soo excited to be there. What damn fun I must say. You can definitely tell I had fun when the mutant 2nd from right came out to perform. TAKE A STAB at some of the numbers he did. You know Trav did some dance moves to those. And sang out loud, laughing the whole damn time.

All in all, I would have to say we had a great time in Myrtle Beach. I mean, we got free accomodations, free food, and got to have our picture taken with Garth Brooks (hey Joe, ya jealous?)

Ch-ch-ch-changes

2005-09-04T02:12:00.000-04:00

As some of you may have found out already, I am updating my blog's look.
It is still in the work in progress stage and all, but, it should be done soon...I gotz to git on to other things.
Not much doing here except waiting to hear about job in Orlando, figuring out how to keep my small amount of money I have earned here and there (eBay, monthly check from Free Times) without spending it, and watching with baited breath D and my yearly tv addiction of Big Brother. They gave the good ol' heav ho to the token gay guy, Beau, tonight. Whatta fuckin annoying guy he was. Don't let the door hit ya on ur pink sueded ass on the way out, baby. Now, if we can only get 3 more of the shithead group, "The Friendship", outta the house...
Keep watching for updates here folks...more banners and more new bells and whistles to be added in the coming days.
Get ready, friends...it's gonna be a TOTAL EXPERIENCE!

Reminiscing, Ray Ray, and Ringtones

2005-08-26T23:08:00.000-04:00

It seemed like yesterday I was rocking my baby sis, Rachel to sleep or changing her stinky diapers.
Now I have just gotten back from taking her to college.
Time flies.
I have been checking in with her every so often over the last few days and can remember when I was nervous about starting a new chapter of my life and all that stuff.
I know you will do great, Ray. Best o' luck.
I will always be here if you need me.
I have been busy working on my resume' and stuff, applying for a job in Orlando that Mel found for me on Career Builder.
It's an Illustrator/ Designer position. They are looking for someone with a background in caricature. What are the odds, eh?
From what I could find out about them online, they seem to have some ties with the military....we shall see.
This is the dilemma here: D and I want to leave Columbia. He has sent a resume' to the VA hospital in Orlando blindly, hoping to get a response or garner interest. He doesn't expect to hear anything or what not but is giving his all to try at least.
I want to get out of Columbia and try at a career for me, but I don't know what this means for us.
Only time will tell, as these are The Days Of Our Lives....cue soapy music.
Speaking of music....got an upgraded cel phone last week to stay in touch with Rachel in school and with mom now that she is alone with Jake at the apt.
I have ringback tones on my phone (you call me up, you'll hear music instead of the phone ringing).
Currently, I have two choices: The Perfect Way by Scritti Politti, an 80's gem, and Eden by Hooverphonic, a song I have loved for a long while.
Not unline American Idol, I would like you all to vote on which tone you want to hear when calling me and leave a comment at the end of this blog post. I will make sure your ears are ringing with the right sounds that way.
I also have new ringtones for everyone and they are:
Bri-Pee Wee theme (new and improved! reminds me of you)
Joe- Back to the Future theme (couldn't find any Garth and didn't want Larry the Cable Guy ringtones on my phone, so this was the closest thing that reminded me of u...u and I obsessing over these movies...it's a cool ringtone too)
Mel- They-Jem (reminds me of you-u played it alot)
Stac-Sittin' Up In My Room-Brandy (yeh I found it. now electric slide yo ass girl!)
Laura- Buffy the Vampire Slayer theme (you+me+Buffy=good times)
Jen-Degrassi Junior High theme (couldn't believe I saw this)
Jo- Dontcha-Pussycat Dolls (originally mom wanted this but found I Love Lucy and wanted that for hers. This one reminds me of you cuz you are so damn wild and RAW! I had Brass Monkey for yours but gave it to my bro instead....his crazy ass)
Steph- California (OC Theme) (You KNOW I had to get this one for you, girl!)
Duane- Invincible-Pat Benatar (got this for D-he loves this song and the movie The Legend of Billie Jean)
Rachel- Hollaback Girl-Gwen Stefani (reminds me of all the times I drove you to school this past year while I was visiting and scaring the shit out of your classmates by rolling down the windows and yelling THE SHIT IS BANANAS! at them.)
There you have it folks. If any of you are reading this and are saying "What the hell about me??!!?!", ask yourselves if you gave me your cel number and then if not, GIVE IT TO ME ALREADY!
I want to thank you all for the please to return to this here blog. I was going to plunge myself out of a 5 story window when I read them and your love pulled me back in.
I am going out of town with Duane again this coming Sunday thru Tuesday (shaddup Jen) but I will be back with many stories to share and might *gasp!* even post before I leave!
Take care all of you and have a great weekend!
Later bitches!

MIA

2005-08-20T00:48:00.000-04:00

Ok, so I've been outta the loop for a while now.
Sorry.
It goes something like this: travelling to Orlando, having a great time with Bri, Mel and Stacy, working on resume when back home, getting said resume' together along with cover letter and samples, going to local SC Kinko's and battling inbred retards, finally sending off everything to company in Orlando, getting D's resume' and cover letter together and mailed off to Orlando VA in hopes of a "bite", eBay eureka selling, weekly household chores, weekly blotter illustration work, ideas for new website via Mel, getting on road again tomorrow morning to help Rachel move in to college next Tuesday.
There. Whew.
So sorry I haven't been in the loop.
I promise to be after next Tuesday (or maybe even before....who knows).
Cheers all.

Coming Distractions...and a BIG UPs to MEL!

2005-08-10T09:37:00.000-04:00

I've been super-immersed like a madman in making banners for Rachel's blog. I have been having so much fun with that.
If you all look, Duane's blog has two varying banners at the top. I am loving this stuff!
Big ups to Bri, Mel and Jen for getting me hooked on the whole banner thing. I think this here blog will be getting a facelift soon but not sure if I am going for a WHOLE Dolemite theme.
I have to say I do like the random movie image banners. What do you guys think?
Hit me up on here and lemme know if it would be too damn cheezy to do what I did on Rachel's blog on mine?
In other news, the hole we thought the squirrels were getting into the house is finally closed up.
This morning, however, it sounded like a gaggle of them were scurrying around inside again.
Damn them and their little resourceful asses!
Finally, all of you Busey fans out there (like me and my sis Rachel), get ready to rejoice.
The man is back and in (my fave genre) a horror movie!
Not just any horror movie.
Click here to see the trailer now.
And for any of you that want to see the poster art, here you go:

PLEASE make sure you watch the trailer. This is gonna be some good shit! Right up there with Jack Frost, Dolly Dearest, Demonic Toys, Puppetmaster, Leprechaun, Rumplestilskin,ahh. The list goes on....
UPDATE!UPDATE!UPDATE!UPDATE!UPDATE!UPDATE!UPDATE!UPDATE!
This just in:
Mel Sikorski has finished her online portfolio and it is the fuckin' SHIT!
PLEASE do yourself a favor and check it out here.
I am so proud of her.....sniff, sniff, like a momma with some tig ol' bitties crying in her handkerchief.
Mel, ya did good girl....it's great!

It's 6am...

2005-08-06T06:30:00.000-04:00

and I am writing to you all.
One of those little >!@#*&@#!bleeps!< is in the wall again EARLY this morning.
Duane got up and beat against the wall and it quited down.
Then it started again.
I just got up and came in here to let you all know about this.
As I sign on to the computer, I notice a LOOOONG delay in the internet loading.....
ahhh.
It's the cable modem signal.
The signal is shitty because one of those little bastards knocked down the cable line yesterday.
It's gonna take like a year to get this posted.
I hope we catch more of em today.
I am gonna leave this next group in the slum part of town. They desuuurve it.

Varmints!

2005-08-05T16:40:00.000-04:00

We are being attacked here at home people.
Today, our phone (or cable, can't tell) line was cut down.
At night, we can hear them trying to get into our house.
We see them on our deck taunting us during the day and night.
Sometimes, Duane will look out the big window in the kitchen and he will catch a group of them staring right into his eyes.
I always thought before I moved here that Duane was imagining things.
I was wrong.
Dead wrong.
They are out to get us.
To ruin our home, our sleep, our lives.
I am talking about the muthafuckin squirrels in our backyard.
As I posted earlier, Duane bought some traps to catch them bastards last week, and we put em up on Tuesday.
Didn't catch any of em.
Until today.
That's right.
I came outside to find one of the many cables attached to our house on the ground.
I looked to one trap, it was empty, but in the other one, was a fat wad of fur, struggling to get out.
I laughed out loud and did what anyone in my situation would do: I went in and got the camera.
I sat and snapped photo after photo of the mothafucka, while he went into a frenzy in the cage.
I was giggling all the while, taunting him, thinking of all the past nights' sleep I had lost at his and his brethren's paws. Scratching all damn night in between our walls and shit.
It was fun to degrade the little animal like that while he was scared shitless.
I am not evil, I have just lost all compassion for the little beasts.
Before, D would try to poison them or spray them with some chemical to kill em, and I would get on him about nature, God's creatures, etc.
NONSENSE!
These little beasties are ferocious, and not to mention most importantly of all, ABUNDANT.
They're all over the fuckin' yard.
We took the little captive in the car and miles away to the side of a road and dumped his little acorn-lovin' ass into the wild. C-YA!
Go to flickr here to see our Amazing Adventure captured in photo.
Yeh.....we bad. We know it.

No no no no....don't FUNK IN MY TRUNKS

2005-08-04T17:17:00.000-04:00

Let me just start out by posting this.
I wanted to post it 2 days ago when I unearthed it but, I wanted to keep the Fanny poster up for her birthday (the full part of the day).
I don't know why but this pic makes me DIE laughing. Since I saw it, it's been all over the place on the internet, and so having said that....
I shall move on.
I have gotten the Flickr bug from seeing all of your pics on the site and I figured I would give it a whirl.
I put up the first set of pics....from Duane and my trip to VA last weekend. Check em out here.
I hope you all enjoy...it was quite fun. I will REALLY be posting some more pics later as I can see it will become an obsession of mine.
Speaking of obsession: I have also, aside from basking in the newly reran eps of The Golden Palace on Lifetime, gotten the "itch" to start eBaying.
Been meaning to for a while (got a TON of worthless shit I need to get rid of), but last night I just got the major push I needed (they are coming out with an ULTIMATE Buffy DVD collection, featuring all 7 seasons plus a new disc).
I am a WHORE when it comes to Buffy and I'm hawking all my 7 seasons worth of DVDs on eBay.
That's what it took.
Now I am off and running. I have put up more stuff today and will continue to do so til we have successfully gotten rid of extra CRAP we don't need around here anymore.
This weekend shall also see the beginning of work on the outer installations on the house for Halloween this year.
I will DEFINITELY post about that later on.
Hope all is well with my favorite little bugaboos.
Until next time......

Happy Birthday Fanny!

2005-08-02T12:16:00.000-04:00

I have known Jo for going on 10 years now and I can't believe it!
It seems like almost yesterday we were at O-House, quoting Dolemite, waxing philosophical on life and relationships, and laughing til' we were red in the face from acting totally STOOPID.
Fanny-here's to hoping you have a great day today...
Happy Birthday, Sporty Spice.
GIRL POWER!

Devastation!!!

2005-07-29T19:49:00.000-04:00

I am torn apart folks.
Today, I look to my Yahoo page for my usual late breaking world news and was torn apart.
Two issues I feel MUCHO strongly about had my eyes seeing red.
The threat of terrorism is very serious.
But so is this story here.
We need to stop the threat of Hollywood blunderheads babbling on about things they should have no part of.
Let's just spell it out plainly here folks: we need to put a stop to the likes of Freddie Prinze Jr.

He has stanked up many a flick in his time, with his open-mouth style of "Whuh?" acting.
To say this human stain can act is like saying Tara Reid is a LITTLE drunk.
The man is a pantywaist.
What made me mad as hell today was the news, that while promoting his new fall show, "Freddie", (all about the WACKY trevails of growing up priviledged with not talent), he told reporters that his wife Sarah Michelle Gellar, would NEVER consider doing aNOTHER Buffy project again.
My heart sunk.
While I giggled inside at the whole scene that occured at this "press junket" and by the fact that NO ONE gave two shits about "Freddie", but wanted to talk about his wife, I couldn't help but feel a large stake get jabbed into my heart.
No Buffy movies in the future?
Mothafucka you gotta be KIDDING ME! That's what I have been LIVING for for like, FOREVER....or at least when the show ended May 2003!
WHATTA BASTARD! And it would figure he would be the one to deliver that nasty bit o' news!
Who am I kidding? When Sarah Michelle Gellar's shitty stint as movie star is done (which should be soon), she'll be CRAWLING back to the role that made her famous!
She better do it FAST, too bitch!
The OTHER bit o sad news is about my Paula.

That poor Miss Abdul.
Saw her recently on a news show and she was slurring away.
Not makin' any damn sense.
Talking about some manicure infection she got. Great, Paula. What happened to you my child?
The latest news is she is being investigated before the new season of American Idol begins due to the allegation from that asswipe loser Cory Clark, who said she had an affair with him during season 2 of the show.
Although I wouldn't put it past my girl, it's a shame she is swirling down the shitter so quickly.
Ah....the days of Skat Kat and Diet Coke commercials.....
Well....I am off to a weekend of getting out of town with Duane....we shall return Monday!
Ya'll be good my little bloggers!
A quick shout-out to Bob, whom I did some work for on his upcoming book, Call the Cops!.
Hope this blog doesn't throw you for a loop.
I know I'm crazy.....but I'm a damn loveable guy too!
Check out Bob's blog link to the side!
LATER!

Happy Bday DOUBLETIME!

2005-07-25T10:22:00.000-04:00

Today, let's celebrate the birthdays of two friends of mine.
They both fall in the same day and they both live in or near California.
First up, a Happy Birthday wish goes out to the Big Cheezy himself, my best bud, Joe Wegat.
Joe and I met in 8th grade when I moved to a California and we have been best friends ever since.
Through different school years, different cliques, family issues at home, we have always remained good friends. I hope you have a happy birthday spud..........

Today's other birthday wish goes out to my pal Steph, whom I met my Junior year at SCAD. We met, along with Laura in our Intro to Animation class with one Miss nutbag Hoescher.
We would get together as a group and go to movies, hang out in my dorm room, catch the People's Court and recognize people together, swap horror stories about home life, and watch cheezy horror movie marathons. It wasn't until last April that we saw each other again, but now we keep in touch via the internet and will hopefully hang out again soon.

Happy Birthday you two......hope it's a great one!

The Devil's Rejects

2005-07-21T13:32:00.000-04:00

Me and muh boys are getting along smashingly today. There they are up top there. Buddy is the older, maturer one. Caesar is the younger, more hotshot of the two.Together, they can be dangerous.
As I was working on this post, I went outside to check on them and couldn't find em'. The next door neighbor dog, Sammy (whom we looked after a few weeks ago), was barking excitedly. I looked around the yard, couldn't find them. Then I saw the supposed "WILD" one under the fig tree in the shade like a "good boy". I called for Buddy, the older, more "MATURE" one, and saw him running alongside the fence on the OTHER SIDE!!! He was in the freakin' neighbor's yard! I looked again at the fig tree and the innocent one Caesar, and he was deliberately covering up the handy work the two miscreants had been working on each time I had left them outside: they had dug a hole from our yard, under the fence, to the other yard! Damn! It was a jail break! That shit was like Shawshank! I couldn't do anything but laugh at my two little criminal boys. They just looked up at me, wagging their tails, while I cleaned off their muddy paws...
Last night we went to the Devil's Rejects screening and had a DAMN good time! We both enjoyed the movie (I was afraid I would get the dreaded "duckbill pout" from D in protest after it was over, but he dug the gritty, filthy flick!) Me toooooo! We were outnumbered by hillbillies and goth people there at the screening, but that's my type o' crowd, doesn't bother me at all (anyone that's doing their own thing and not judging anyone else is a big thumbs up in my book).
They gave away free mini posters like this one:

They also gave away cool-ass buttons like this one(and I was only able to get two: one fo' me and one fo' my bro, Jake).

They were also throwing tshirts out to the audience, and Trav being the very coordinated and athletic badass he is, caught one mid-air, one-handed, to the gasps and "DAMN!" of the hillbillies behind us. What can I say? I'm just good like that!
Check out the shirt here->
All in all, a great night. Definitely one of the better movies that we've seen this summer so far.
Better than Mr. and Mrs. Smith, War of the Worlds, Batman, and Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (although that one wasn't all that bad).

How Much is That Doggie...

2005-07-20T12:56:00.000-04:00

So, we're dog sitting here at the Blandford-Falligant estate.
The smell of dog fur fresh from outside on a hot summer day still penetrating my nostrils, I type to you, my faithful readers.
I thought that D and I wanted a dog so bad.
Maybe he still does.
Your friendly neighborhood Trav don't want no dog any time soon.
They are both sweet, well behaved, and all, but I just seem to put them outside a lot and try and run away from them at any chance I get. All that licking is driving me NUTS!
Don't call PETA on me yet, though, cuz I still get down and play with em and pick em up and hold the little buggers and all, but, I dunno, I am just a bastard I guess.
In other news, I am dragging my sweet D to Charlotte tonight.
Nabbed us advance movie screening passes for the new Rob Zombie throwback to 70's exploitation, grindhouse pictures: The Devil's Rejects.
It's a sequel to the less-than-stellar-but-still-cool-in-it's-own-right House of 1000 Corpses, a movie I have pimped on here before.
They usually hand out free shit at theses screenings and ask what the audience thought and shit. If I snag some good schwag, then I will be up front and center, all white trash-like, saying how WONDERFUL it was, no matter what.
If anyone wants me to pick up anything for them, hollar. You know, like Devil's Rejects salt and pepper shakers. A Devil's Rejects scented stationary set. You name it.
Speaking of cool memorabilia, check this shit out I found on eBay this morning.
Now that puts my Seed of Chucky condoms to shame, hands down. Very creative. If you have seen the movie, you will get the joke.
Also, I have finally had a bit of enlightenment on my artwork. I think I have figured out my style as an illustrator. This has been keeping me up recently at night and has haunted me for years now. Going over my old stuff and checking my strengths and weaknesses, I think I have found a weiner.
I will be posting more on this startling change of events soon enough.
Finally, get yo bitch asses over to Twisted Yarn and see the new story I started.
Spooookeeee...

Happy Birthday Wishes to Stacy!!!

2005-07-13T15:24:00.000-04:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY STAC!!!!!!
A big Happy Birthday goes out to our friend Stacy who I have known now for going on 11 years now......wow! Time has flown by.
Stac has always been a fun gal to tell stories with, watch movies with, talk spooky ghost shenanigans with, she's our own personal E-Ticket to Disney when we're in Orlando.
She lets us stay at her house, she drives us around, gets up hip to new music, and also lets us pet her pussies.
All in all, a DEAR friend and great all around gal!
D and I wish you a happy birthday girl and hope you have a great day today! I am sure we will see you soon!
Not much else doing here: big shout out to Rachel (aka Filthy Bird, aka #7, aka Maggot...the list goes on)...who is now on the road with her friend Alyssa and her fam to Philly and then New York! Be careful and have a great trip.
The big apple ain't gonna be the same when they getta glimpse of YOUR big apples!

Hell To Tha NO!!!!

2005-07-09T21:53:00.000-04:00

Awwww Hellll NO!

"Dont'chaWannaDanceSayYaWannaDance, Don't Ya Wanna Dance?"

You Oughta Be In Pictures...

2005-07-07T17:39:00.000-04:00

The big T and his pal D are in a new film that hits theateres July 15.
You should all check it out.
Go here to view the trailer.
Big thanks to Rachel for the heads up.
In other late breaking news: Trav just received his first official complaint as freelance illustrator for The Free Times here in Columbia.
As most of you know, I do a weekly editorial illustration for the Crime Blotter section of this local paper here in hellhole, Columbia.
The editor emailed me today and let me know that the Columbia Urban League was upset by my June 15 illustration and felt it was "racially offensive".
I have been waiting for a complaint since I started doing these illustrations a year and a half ago for the paper.
First one, so I feel "official" now.
For those of you that want to know, the image can be viewed here.
Suprise, though, in contrast, that no one took offense to the piece I did in last week's paper (for instance).
Go figure.

Sometimes You Feel Like a Nut...

2005-07-06T17:24:00.000-04:00

Hey folks.
Figured it was time for another new post.
Miss ya already Laura. Had a great time.
Everyone, we look forward to Halloween if I hadn't beat that into your skulls enough.
Above is a picture of Mariah Scarey (who I still really like despite much ridicule) and who's new album is actually really good.
Anyhoo-if no one has noticed, Mariah ain't on the Lohan/Ritchie diet.
The girl likes to eat like the rest of us and the only workout she gets is from bending down to pose with the homeless.
She's such the humanitarian.
She feels the need to support the plight to end poverty by sacrificing herself and her Gucci gown and taking it to the streets, where she poses among the less fortunate,"lower life forms".
This'll get people aware Mariah....either that, or you are pulling one seriously fucked up prank, girl.
She has really publicly lost it recently, though.
Look at the picture above.
She had one of her entourage makeup artists PAINT abs on her supple tummy for a July 4th concert. HEELARIOUS!
That's about as seamless as this.
On a side note about celeb nuttiness, go here for your Cruise fix if you haven't already. Ah, I love it sooooooo.

He's a Yanky Doodle Dandy.....

2005-07-01T15:08:00.000-04:00

Happy 4th of July Weekend to everyone!
Hope it all goes off with a bang and you all party it up like all get out.
Laura will be coming up to visit tonight and stay through Monday.
We don't have a DAMN thing planned but I for one can't wait for her to visit. I need friend-contact BAD (and don't let your minds go to the gutter).
It'll be great to have her here.
Again, I am plugging D and my "Halloween Spooktacular" this year at our place, 2005-edition style bitches.
We want everyone that can come up to stay, to consider it. It'll be one HELLUVA good time!
It might even be a Killlller Paaaaaahty!
Expect more posting on here as things get worked out.
If you all haven't read the newest edition of The Big City News, do it here. (Doo it. Doo it.)
Whatta photo. Whatta story.
Whatta hilarious damn good time!
Peace out to all you filthy posters and remember what the good ol' Captain (above) says:
"Have a Great 4th of July, for the love of Jane Russell's big fat horse's ass on toast!"

Snapshot

2005-06-30T17:50:00.000-04:00

Aye-Aye Jenn!
Thanks for the much-needed kick to the rumpcakes to get me to do another post.
I have good reason too though:
The cd Bri put together from our gang's compiled pix taken during our Savannah sojourn came in the mail today!
MUCHO THANKS to Bri! It is great!
I love all the pictures that Jenn and Steph and the Big B took.
I hope everyone gets a big kick outta it as much as I did.
The above one of Fanny ala "Vertigo" had me ROLLING.
Duane and I have been talking to you all about a "reunion" of sorts here in Columbia, SC around October.
I plan on posting an invite to you all very soon on this here blog.
I hope you all can make it. We had a BLAST in Savannah with everyone and wanna do it again, like NOW, but will have to settle for the next best "party time".
Nothin' says fun like scaring the local ass-tight conservatives and their kids during Halloween.
You are alllllll invited! We have a big ol' house, food, AC, movies, drinks: YOU NAME IT, WE GOTZ IT (or can get it!). We want the whole gang back together again.
Maybe we can have a screening of the movie trailer for the new Abortion Man movie coming out......ya never know....
....maybe....just MAYBE.....the Big Bear (from his Big Blue-Ass House) or Rakeman might make an appearance......
Stay tuned......

This Just In!...

2005-06-26T11:49:00.001-04:00

Ok. So I watch Entertainment Tonight instead of CNN for my latest breaking news.

I check out Best Week Ever instead of Nightline for what's happening in the world.

I can still report on the news, dammit.

That's why I love Duane so much. He keeps me in check with the "actual news" events.

He reads the paper. (And not just the help wanted and movie time sections).

Below are some AMAZING (yet dated images from our wonderful State newspaper here in Columbia Duane wanted me to share with you readers.

The above pic is not that new to most of my friends as we shared it with you on the last Savannah excursion. This is a mockup bust of a woman whose corpse was found last March by local police. Forensic artists tried to recreate what the woman would have looked like.

What an amazing job they did.

Apparantely, the woman was the child of Sloth from the Goonies, and Aunt Jemima. It also bears a striking resemblance to the title character in the movie, Mask.

Great job, guys. I am sure she looked JUST LIKE THAT.

Who heard about this nutjob? He reminds me of one of the performers of the Misfits or some death rockband like that. Is it me, or is this story so damn unbelievable that it seems fabricated?

I mean, don't judge a book by it's cover, but.......THIS book's cover was made outta see-through plastic or some shit! I mean, COME ON!!!!!! That fucker's face scares the shit outta me...PLUS, he's Canandian....even scarier, eh?

This has been a newsbreak bullentin from Trav's Total Experience....

Back to the regular shit.

Two Thumbs WAY up!

2005-06-25T22:53:00.000-04:00

Does anyone remember Trav's stint right outta college working at the local Carmike theater in Savannah GA?
Yep, right after I received a 4 year undergraduate degree from a prestigious art college, I jumped right into work....at a local movie theater.
SHADDUP NAYSAYERS!
Anyhoo-if you remember Trav's foray into minimum wage, you'll also quite possibly recall he worked with a kooky gang of misfits and quite enjoyed his time there.
(Showing the print of Patch Adams upside down on opening night after splicing it incorrectly stands out as one of my many highlights. Ain't nothin like seein' Robin honking his clown nose for a cancer patient kid upside down-OR to see the entire audience of said film turn slowly in unison and look up at you in the projection booth)..."BUT, I digress" (copyright Joe Wegat).
One of my fellow pals who I worked with there, and still keep in contact with to this day, is my old manager, Lee Karr. Some of you may remember him from meeting him or hearing him and I battle it out in an Insult-a-Thon towards one another about our cinematic tastes in film, or even better, horror series.
Ok, so here's the point: Lee is a HUGE George Romero fan. He is IN LOVE with zombie films and Romero films.
Well, as you all might know from the recent commercials on tv and all, there is a new Romero zombie film out. This man is the one that started the zombie film, with Night of the Living Dead. He then went on to do Dawn of the Dead and Day of the Dead.
The new one is Land of the Dead.
Lee moved to Pittsburgh, where he always wanted to go, his mecca where the Romero zombie epics were shot.
There you will find the Monroeville mall used in the original Dawn of the Dead and the cemetery used in the original Night of the Living Dead.
Lee, through some contacts, was able to be made up as a zombie and be an extra in the new Land of the Dead film. When I heard this news from him, I about freaked. That's his freakin' DREAM!
I even got him to send me a signed 8x10 glossy of him made up. Makes me die laughing.

I know he creamed his jeans while being in that shoot.
They recently held the premiere of the film in Pittsburgh, and for the last couple of days, Lee has been able to meet some pretty well-known people.
He took directors Quentin Tarantino (Pulp Fiction, Kill Bill) and Robert Rodriguez (From Dusk Til' Dawn, Sin City) on a tour of Monroeville Mall.

He then took Tarantino and Simon Pegg (center in the glasses), who I LOVED in Shaun of the Dead (YEH, he's Shaun!) to the cemetery where Night of the Living Dead was shot.

This bastard is LUCKEEEEEEEEE.
I was so jealous but at the same time so happy for this fellow film geek cuz he is living his dream and finally meeting all the people he has idolized for years.
Ahhh....one day. I know my dream will come true.
Watch mofos:

Trav will be starring in Child's Play 8: Chucky Don't Play That soon enough!