Murrrry Chrruusssmass!

Ok.
If nothing gets any of you into the Christmas spirit, then this news clip will.
When I got home yesterday, Duane had saved this for me on the DVR. We both have a heart, but SHIT this is funny.
Some of you may have seen this clip already, but, it is worthy of many repeat viewings. We were afraid we couldn't get it up on the blog without mucho xtra effort (which we thought wasn't worth it), until I found the clip on the local news' website.
Please wait after the lame-ass ad at the beginning and then watch the video, paying close attention to the figure that falls to it's knees and scrambles to pick up their weave on the floor of the Walmart entrance.
This is a video of people trampling one another to shop early day after Thanksgiving, this past week.
The sheer hilarity of this is heightened by the appearance of "Wanda". I don't know if this is her name, but damn the woman looks like a "Wanda".
What an amazing choice of hair she has chosen too. That weave almost gets her killed.
Watch the mayhem and then how the clip has an immediate cut to her crying with her wig shoved roughly back onto her head. You'd swear she was Queenie with those tears comin' outta nowhere. "Oh Dolemite, I'm so glad yo home".
Our hearts go out to "Wanda".
Thanks for the laugh girl.
Hope Santa brings you some Excedrin this Christmas season along with a brand new weave, girl.
Please click on the pic below of this year's biggest toy seller for the holidays: the Ghetto Barbie, to see the mayhem.
(The clip is in Windows Media format)

Sayonara, Miyagi-Son

Fresh from a turkey coma, I awoke today to hear the sad news that Mr. Miyagi, Pat Morita, passed away in Las Vegas yesterday at age 73.
Let's all take a moment to pay tribute to da Wax On, Wax Off Masta!

Happy Gobble Gobble From the 3-Ring Circus

I am coming to you live from the nuthouse known as my mom's apartment. Cousins are visiting and eating all the food. Brother has brought me to the point of picking up and leaving last night. Mom is currently in the other room preaching religion and the divorce between her and my dad and how MUCH it has affected my brother. What about me and Rachel?!?!?! YEESH! Sanity has left this place like, 5 years ago. I will be spending a day or so here for Christmas and I am outta here. Mom has lost it. FULLY. Her and Jake are complete INSANE PEOPLE!
I hate family get-togethers.
Hope everyone elses was less-eventful.
Gobble! Gobble!
PS- To all mofos! Duane and I were talking about a major get-together in Orlando this coming New Years! That means EVERYONE! We were talking about getting a house for rent or something for the New Year's weekend! My sis Rachel will be coming up now (after all the nuttiness) because she has a long Christmas break, so she will finally get to hang with everyone. PLEASE join us, chickens. It'll be a CLUCK-in' good time!

Gala Coverage

This is Z Big T coming to you with coverage from this past Friday night's World AIDS Day Gala here in beautiful Columbia, SC.
It was a premiere event, with everyone arriving in elegant evening gowns, serving of wine, hors d'oeuvres, and art on display.

The writer and star of the HBO Films' Lackawanna Blues, Ruben Santiago-Hudson, was there to show his film at the benefit and the audience was enraptured. Duane and myself really enjoyed the film, and the older gentleman behind us showed his interest and appreciation for the film by snoring loudly through 2/3 of the entire showing. Ah. Class.
I was there to help premiere a new series of posters for the local SC/HIV Council that I illustrated. The reaction of the attendees was very positive and Beverly Smith, my contact at the agency, touted me to everyone that stopped at our table. A lot of people walked away with my promotional mailer in their hands.
There was a band playing at a post-reception after the film, and a looong line for the late evening food. D and I slipped out after saying our goodbyes and ended our wonderful night out on the town with a drive thru at Wendy's where the hollow-eyed attendant gipped us on our fries.
Magic, indeed.

Warm Fuzzies

Yo peeples.
Back from a day of errands and getting ready fo' bed, I just wanted to post this pic D took of me this morning.
After reading Jen's blog, it looked like we both had the same idea.
The pic is of me sporting the COOLEST damn scarf from none other than my pal Steph Lehman that she sent me last Feb or so. I too, like Jen, am just now posting a pic of the fruits of Steph's labor.
Thanks my dear! It was colder than a witch's tit in a brass bra today and that scarf came in handy girl. Can't you tell by my face? You woulda thought I was living in Antartica and shit. I had on like 10 layers. But I looked scorching hot so that's all that mattered.
I think my scarf will be travelling with me to Roanoke, VA this Thanksgiving too! So thanks again to my pal Steph, for my first scarf EVER!
Before I go, I have to leave you with this warning: do not be fooled by the recent mouthwatering ads you may have seen, the new Lobster Lasagna at Macaroni Grill ain't all that.
Kinda gross actually.
I will be posting tomorrow.
Until then....nite.

Jive Term Friday, Yo

This week's Jive Term kiddies is Dime Out. Hopefully no one has been dimed out recently. If so, you betta take that shit to tha streets and beat the crap outta whoever dimed you out.
Some more rambling before the weekend:

• Has anyone seen My Name Is Earl on NBC? That shit is too funny. I recorded a block of eps last weekend and just got to finishing them up this morning. That show is awesome. Why is it that tv shows are, like, TEN TIMES better than movies these days? I remember seeing the preview for My Name Is Earl at the theater at the end of last summer and that shit was more entertaining than any other trailer or even the feature. Whatta damn shame. I blame the drought of John Waters, Chucky, Freddy, and Jason pics not flooding the market right now. A damn shame.
• Tonight is the big shindig for World AIDS Day where my posters will be "unveiled". Not looking forward to this at. all. #1 don't llike big hootenannies like this. #2 Don't like to dress up (unless it involves me wearing my Michael Myers Peeing on Jason Hockey Mask tshirt and jeans). Maybe this is why I love Earl so much...
• I am thinking of starting a new feature on this blog similar to Oprah. I want to make everyone do better in their lives. I am inspired. Maybe I'll make you all save spare change that you find in your sofas, bottoms of your cars, etc. Maybe I will just have you each do a good deed a day and then post on here what you have done. Maybe we should all build a house for the homeless or something. More breaking news on this idea a little later...
• I am also wanting to redesign the Twisted Carnival blog for use all year round. New banners. New look. Etc. I kinda want it to be a surprise so I am not gonna divulge my idears on here just yet.
• Gotta figure out the quickest and best way to get to Rachel's college Tuesday. Duane, the Master In Commander of Directioneering (is that a word?) will help me with a map to chart my voyage into hicksville to get Ray. Can't wait. All I have to say is that I finally downloaded the last two COVETED tracks from the Bea Arthur on Broadway soundtrack off Limewire and I am so damn happy. I'll be playing that shit on the way up to get Ray. Bea Arthur's the bomb and I STILL kick myself for not going to see her in Savannah when that show came through town. Damn you Hyatt and me for stressing myself out too much at that job to get tickets!
• Ok, confession: Bri, I haven't sent out the remaining pics of Steph's on cd yet. I PROMISE I will very soon. I'm a slack-ass. I also have to record a bunch of Rachel's Gilmore Girls and Arrested Development eps on VHS but I don't feel like it yet. So Ray, you may not get them for Thanksgiving. I just look at it this way: when can you watch them? You don't have a VCR at school, and, I don't think you'll get to them during Thanksgiving with the damn cousins coming in for the holiday, so, wait it out. How bout' for Christmas?
• After Thanksgiving and back home here, there will be some serious job looking and talks with D about VA openings and where they are. The dream of Orlando is slipping away slowly. Everyone say a little prayer that there will be an opening there. (Ok, I know you don't pray, but do it for this one thing DAMMIT!)
• Also, just hitting the net this morning, the new Superman trailer. Pretty badass. Go here on JoBlo to see it. It's in glorious Quicktime. For those of you that don't have it, there's a guy in a blue suit and a red cape. He's pretty damn hot. Anyways, he flies and stuff. Get someone with Quicktime to tell you about it.And while on the topics of links, check out this movie poster contest on Worth 100. Pretty cool.

Enough rambling. Travy-T's gotta go get a haircut with my ghetto girls at Hair Cuttery. I'll tell em all you say hi. Then off to the Value Brakes to make an appointment for tomorrow to have the cars' brakes looked at. Then to the bookstore to peruse the magazine rack and pick up the People's Sexiest Men Alive issue. (I always look forward to that. Tee hee. It's like my personal Tiger Beat for the year).Chat you bitches up later. Have a great weekend.

The Emancipation of Travy-T

HALLELUJAH!
I am finally finished with the 9-poster series for the SC HIV Council. It was a long, arduous road, but it's done.
At the last minute, I had to change 2 images and so, out of 9, I really like 7. Tomorrow night is a big World AIDS Day benefit. They are holding a screening of the film Lackawanna Blues and the writer and star of the film will be talking. There will be a pre and post reception and it will be really Ra-Sha-Shaaa. More pics to follow on that. I was telling D I really don't have anything nice besides my badass t-shirt collection, so, I will have to improvise with some semi-classy old things I have lying around in the closet. So about the benefit, my posters will be showcased there. I hopefully don't have to do dick but just show up with Duane and enjoy the evening and talk to my friends from the HIV Council. Down the line, it would be super-cool badass if the posters got national attention, but, for right now, they will be used here in SC for AIDS awareness.
It was a long, long road to finishing these posters. I don't think I would have gotten through them without my good friends Madge (or Esther), Mimi, and the Goddess herself, Oprah.
You see, this past Tuesday was like a powerhouse Tuesday for purchases from Trav. The new Madonna cd came out, a special, super extended, shameful double dip version of Mariah's recent cd, and finally, after months of waiting by me, the Oprah Winfrey 20 yr Collection DVD set came out. I am in Estrogen Hog Heaven and have been since Tuesday.
Firstly, the Madonna cd is off the hook. This will definitely be replayed a gaJILLION times in my cd player like Gwen's last November. Madge is definitely a wackjob in real life lately (aging is making her more insane I think), but this album is her best since Ray of Light. No palates rap in here. There is the use of the word "dork" in a song that is pretty damn embarassing though...
Now, Mimi has emancipated me from my money again, but I am shameless, bitches, shameless. Ask Bri. I am a filthy fan and I purchased the new edition of her recent cd. It has some new tracks which are pretty damn good and also has a DVD with her videos and an unreleased overseas video for my fave track on the album.
Finally, I have been mesmerized by the big O for the past few days. The tears, the Wildest Dreams, the twats in the audience lookin' like they're gonna explode. Duane came home today while I was curled up on the sofa and told me I was watching my Oprah porn. I told him that's correct, and proceeded to show him a scene. "Here comes the money shot" I said as the camera slowly closed in on O's face and she went into her self-titled "ugly cry". That bitch has a trance on me. I LLLLUUUUUVVV her. And it IS like watching porn cuz I had a box of Kleenex beside me today at all times watching the DVDs.
Anyways, long art project over, so cool tunes to listen to (the greated hits of Alanis Morrissette is great too-her cover of Seal's CRAZY is off the hook), and my O on DVD has made for an enjoyable week.
Sorry I have been MIA for the last couple of weeks, but, I will try and update more. I go to pick up Ray Ray at college this coming Tuesday and then home for the holidays. Poor Duane has to stay here and work. I am bummed I won't be spending the holiday with him for yet ANOTHER year, but so is the nutty politics of our families and the non-acceptance, blah blah blah.
Bri-thanks for calling me today to checkin. I will be in touch with you soon.
Laura-thanks for calling today checking in too. Glad to hear you have some time to yourself. (and Harry Pooter this weekend).
Fanny-thanks for the help online this week. Be in touch soon.
Jen, Steph and Josh-whut up my niggas! Steph and Josh: don't rent anymore L Word and rent Boo! and tell me that's NOT the haunted hospital Josh was telling us about! UnCANNY!
Joe-Good talking to you last week. Thanks for the call.
Jason-I will get in touch with u via email 'bout those feta sketches. Congrats on the radio show. I will put up a link on this blog with the feta image once we have one worked out.
Back tomorrow with a jive term!
Peace out bitches.....time to go discuss with Duane the outcome of tonight's episode of Reunion on FOX. That shit is ADDICTIVE!

Better Late Than Never Jive Term Friday!

Hello faithful readers.
I'm a little late to da game today, but here is your Jive Term of the Week to take you through your weekend.
It's getting cold kiddies, so I hope you all bundle up and enjoy your weekends!

On my end...still working on that HIV poster project/campaign! All the posters are due by next Friday, not today, as I previously thought, so I have a little longer to procrastinate and to come up with some brilliant ideas and illustrations!
Don't forget to try out this week's jive term on friends and loved ones!
Until next time...

Hi Ho, Hi Ho...

Hello friends.
I have been MIA (cool name for a music group, eh Jen?) for a little bit due to work on those SC HIV posters I have been telling you all about. It's been going pretty well but just a HELLUVA lot of time being spent.
I found out the even they will be presented at is not until NEXT Friday, the 18th. A nice sigh of relief for me, but, I am sure I will still need to have all 9 of these suckers done pretty much by the end of this week if it's off to the printers...
So, anyone come up with a CONCEIVABLE plan for the commune deal? I am all fo' that.
In other breaking news, Duane fixed collards tonight (collard greens), and I actually ate some. For people in the family, they know that the faint SMELL of greens makes me gag and dry heave. These things were pretty damn grrrreat when D fixed em'.
Only problem is, I feel them working their magic and the tidy bowl is calling. YOWZA!
Til next post.....

Jive Friday

Since missing it last week, *sorry all of you who weren't visiting us for Halloween festivities*, the Jive Term of Da Day is back in full force. This Friday's term is ghetto.

As in: Columbia has the most ghetto movie theaters I have ever seen.

Make sure you use it in a sentence today.

This jigga be off to work on some illustrative stuff. Peace out muthafuckas. Til' next post....

The Last Supper

Fear not mere mortals (and Jason), I am back.
The Halloween holiday is gone and so is the Halloween decor' on this blog.
The fun is over.
All our good friends are home safely and only remnants of the Twisted Carnival remain.
I'm kinda sad. It was too fun and ended too soon. I would start an 80's clap for the event, but I don't have everyone to join in clapping with me. Or to join in a nice "uuuuhhhhhhhuuuunnnnhhhhhhhhhhhh" or "BABY!...you so ugly you stop this motion pictcha frum runnin'!"
We had a blast and hope you all did too. Thanks for making it a great time everyone and for coming out.
There will be Flickr pics soon enough for this year's Halloween festivities at our place in Columbia, SC.
Above is one of our "family meals" together while the gang was here.
Enjoy.