Thursday, June 30, 2005

Snapshot

Aye-Aye Jenn!
Thanks for the much-needed kick to the rumpcakes to get me to do another post.
I have good reason too though:
The cd Bri put together from our gang's compiled pix taken during our Savannah sojourn came in the mail today!
MUCHO THANKS to Bri! It is great!
I love all the pictures that Jenn and Steph and the Big B took.
I hope everyone gets a big kick outta it as much as I did.
The above one of Fanny ala "Vertigo" had me ROLLING.
Duane and I have been talking to you all about a "reunion" of sorts here in Columbia, SC around October.
I plan on posting an invite to you all very soon on this here blog.
I hope you all can make it. We had a BLAST in Savannah with everyone and wanna do it again, like NOW, but will have to settle for the next best "party time".
Nothin' says fun like scaring the local ass-tight conservatives and their kids during Halloween.
You are alllllll invited! We have a big ol' house, food, AC, movies, drinks: YOU NAME IT, WE GOTZ IT (or can get it!). We want the whole gang back together again.
Maybe we can have a screening of the movie trailer for the new Abortion Man movie coming out......ya never know....
....maybe....just MAYBE.....the Big Bear (from his Big Blue-Ass House) or Rakeman might make an appearance......
Stay tuned......

Sunday, June 26, 2005

This Just In!...

Ok. So I watch Entertainment Tonight instead of CNN for my latest breaking news.

I check out Best Week Ever instead of Nightline for what's happening in the world.

I can still report on the news, dammit.

That's why I love Duane so much. He keeps me in check with the "actual news" events.

He reads the paper. (And not just the help wanted and movie time sections).

Below are some AMAZING (yet dated images from our wonderful State newspaper here in Columbia Duane wanted me to share with you readers.

The above pic is not that new to most of my friends as we shared it with you on the last Savannah excursion. This is a mockup bust of a woman whose corpse was found last March by local police. Forensic artists tried to recreate what the woman would have looked like.

What an amazing job they did.

Apparantely, the woman was the child of Sloth from the Goonies, and Aunt Jemima. It also bears a striking resemblance to the title character in the movie, Mask.

Great job, guys. I am sure she looked JUST LIKE THAT.

Who heard about this nutjob? He reminds me of one of the performers of the Misfits or some death rockband like that. Is it me, or is this story so damn unbelievable that it seems fabricated?

I mean, don't judge a book by it's cover, but.......THIS book's cover was made outta see-through plastic or some shit! I mean, COME ON!!!!!! That fucker's face scares the shit outta me...PLUS, he's Canandian....even scarier, eh?

This has been a newsbreak bullentin from Trav's Total Experience....

Back to the regular shit.

Saturday, June 25, 2005

Two Thumbs WAY up!

Does anyone remember Trav's stint right outta college working at the local Carmike theater in Savannah GA?
Yep, right after I received a 4 year undergraduate degree from a prestigious art college, I jumped right into work....at a local movie theater.
SHADDUP NAYSAYERS!
Anyhoo-if you remember Trav's foray into minimum wage, you'll also quite possibly recall he worked with a kooky gang of misfits and quite enjoyed his time there.
(Showing the print of Patch Adams upside down on opening night after splicing it incorrectly stands out as one of my many highlights. Ain't nothin like seein' Robin honking his clown nose for a cancer patient kid upside down-OR to see the entire audience of said film turn slowly in unison and look up at you in the projection booth)..."BUT, I digress" (copyright Joe Wegat).
One of my fellow pals who I worked with there, and still keep in contact with to this day, is my old manager, Lee Karr. Some of you may remember him from meeting him or hearing him and I battle it out in an Insult-a-Thon towards one another about our cinematic tastes in film, or even better, horror series.
Ok, so here's the point: Lee is a HUGE George Romero fan. He is IN LOVE with zombie films and Romero films.
Well, as you all might know from the recent commercials on tv and all, there is a new Romero zombie film out. This man is the one that started the zombie film, with Night of the Living Dead. He then went on to do Dawn of the Dead and Day of the Dead.
The new one is Land of the Dead.
Lee moved to Pittsburgh, where he always wanted to go, his mecca where the Romero zombie epics were shot.
There you will find the Monroeville mall used in the original Dawn of the Dead and the cemetery used in the original Night of the Living Dead.
Lee, through some contacts, was able to be made up as a zombie and be an extra in the new Land of the Dead film. When I heard this news from him, I about freaked. That's his freakin' DREAM!
I even got him to send me a signed 8x10 glossy of him made up. Makes me die laughing.

I know he creamed his jeans while being in that shoot.
They recently held the premiere of the film in Pittsburgh, and for the last couple of days, Lee has been able to meet some pretty well-known people.
He took directors Quentin Tarantino (Pulp Fiction, Kill Bill) and Robert Rodriguez (From Dusk Til' Dawn, Sin City) on a tour of Monroeville Mall.


He then took Tarantino and Simon Pegg (center in the glasses), who I LOVED in Shaun of the Dead (YEH, he's Shaun!) to the cemetery where Night of the Living Dead was shot.


This bastard is LUCKEEEEEEEEE.
I was so jealous but at the same time so happy for this fellow film geek cuz he is living his dream and finally meeting all the people he has idolized for years.
Ahhh....one day. I know my dream will come true.
Watch mofos:

Trav will be starring in Child's Play 8: Chucky Don't Play That soon enough!

Boi-yoy-yoiiiiiiiing!!!!!!!!!



K.
So you know I how I don't post cuz I really don't have anything to contribute that often?
Well, this morning, I had some material for you faithful readers: I was on my sites and saw this pic and just HAD to post it.
PLEASE look carefully at good ol' Jack's crotch!
I guess he heard the saying "Once you go black.....you go home in a WHEELCHAIR!"
ALSO, on my ever-exciting quest to prove that Tom Cruise is a freakin' ALIEN, sent down to this planet to take over the brains of everyone through shitty movies and BIZARRE personal appearances, I present another bit of evidence that he has LOST IT.
Please click here for found evidence.
I am just doing this to warn you people......just to warn you.
And by the way, I can sleep safer knowing that Rakeman and his new sidekick, Hoeboy are out there protecting our daily lives!
GO RAKEMAN AND HOEBOY!!!!!!!!!!!

UPDATE!:
Duane and I just finished lunch and an amusing viewing of Bibleman on the local tv station.
If you all haven't seen this show, it's worth a great laugh, or drinking game. Take a shot every time he says "my Sword of the Spirit".
Honestly, D and I couldn't make it past the opening shot of Bibleman and his militant friend who defeated an evil enemy who "wanted a kiss" and who was male....TOTAL homo-tones there! They destroyed the evil homosexual and our remote went to the FOOD NETWORK.

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Oh Happy Day...


Ah.....don't you smell it faithful readers?.........
Happiness is in the air!
I must start off by congratulating Yo B on her engagement! I hope you and John will be happy as ever...both curled up together playing Grand Theft Auto.....when you're, like, in your 70s, slapping hookers and pimpin ho's, whilst blowing shit up with your machine gun and optional rocket launcher!
Yes, happiness is in the air.........Duane bought a beautiful inflatable pool for the deck from Big Lots and we have filled it up over the weekend but have yet to partake in it.....more news to come on that (with pictures even!)
Happiness.....like Tom Cruise getting squirted in the face with a fake mic at one of his movie premieres and then having that footage replayed OVER and OVER again on the news EVERYWHERE....I almost felt sorry for the bastard!
Happiness....that I am FINALLY updating this f-ing blog!
Happiness that I read my friends blogs and laugh out loud to myself-tee hee.
Happiness that Rachel has graduated and all is right with the world...she is finally outta high school hell....
Things are all good here. Sunshine, moonbeams, rainbows, laserbeams (copyright Steph and Jen), rollerskates, pizza, (any happy object floating across the opening credits to Saved By the Bell works here).
Hope you all have a HAPPY day!!!!!!!!!!!!
(And seriously, CONGRATS TO JEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Saturday, June 11, 2005

Pomp....and Circumstance



...(pumpitup,pumpitup,pumpitup)...
Suuunshiiiine and Rain.....
(listen to da Rob Base...)
Sorry, musical interlude. (To the strains of "Joy and Pain")-------------------
My little maggoty sis Rachel, graduated high school yesterday.
I feel so damn old......ancient, if you will.
I am glad she made it through her high school years and on her way to bigger and better things.
Time really did fly and I am very proud of her.
She remained just as filthy as she did when she was just a wee little maggot all through her high school years and kept in touch with her dirty roots. A true Falligant to the end.
Seriously, after all the crap she's been through and all the family turmoil, she made it. She even got a scholarship. SO proud of her!
Congrats Ray! You did it!
Whew!
(You're still a big, steamy #7 from Wendy's).

Monday, June 06, 2005

Hidey Ho...

Chucky wants you all to go out tomorrow and buy his movie, "Seed of Chucky" on DVD.
He says it will help him support his family.
I am gonna do all I can to help him. Even though this movie SUCKED. Even though it's pretty unwatchable.
I'm doing it all for the Chuck. Once a fan, always a fan I must say.
On unrelated notes: has anyone seen the new Eminem video with Triumph the Insult Comic Dog? I was so psyched to see Triumph again on something and when I saw the video...
#1-the song BLOWS.
#2-Is Eminem making fun of Triumph? I'd poop on Eminem for that, but Father Time is about to drop a steaming #2 on him soon enough......the clock is on 14 min. and 56 seconds, Em.
Also, I am following the TomKat stories (Tom and Katie Holmes). I have FOR YEARS figured Tom was a Rock Hudson for our times, paying actresses to marry him for a while, to keep his career going and to keep his life as a raging homosexual secret, but this newest trick to the public ENRAGES me! He's a major nutbag tool.
I hated his ass before, and I COMPLETELY hate it now!
Are we that stupid? The linings of his lies are starting to unravel though...tee hee.
I know this rant is belated (and kinda playa hata), as EVERY blog or entertainment rag has commented on it, but, that alien nutbag Tommy Cruise has GOT to be stopped!
He is appearing on this Thursday's MTV Movie Awards with his newest monetary investment, Katie Holmes, as he gets a Lifetime Achievement Award. (I could barely type that last sentence out......gag!)
Everyone tune in this Thursday for another AMAZING publicity stunt! I read what is to happen and that started this rant.
ALSO, check out those MTV Awards for a Breakfast Club reunion minus the Estevez and the Judd.
Molly is talking a SEQUEL to Sixteen Candles now! SUWEEEET!!!
I am soooo there.....even though it smacks of desperation, Moll.
I wanna know what the Donger has been up to.
Well, gotta leftover giftcard from Best Buy to use tomorrow. Gonna get the new Chucky and Coldplay cd (Chucky DVD movie and Coldplay new cd. NO, they aren't working on a duet).
Gonna get a load of Chucky....
Jealoussssssssssss??????

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Chaotic

Hello my little muffins.
It's been too long.
I don't have a damn thing to say, so I don't post.
Simple as that.
How's everyone?
I read up on all your blogs (and stay in touch with emails of those of you who don't have blogs).
Currently, I am listening to that whore Britney Spears drawl slowly and stupidly about how her "sex is rrrreullly good" with her B-boy Kev on that breath-into-the-camcorder show she has on.
FUCKIN' HATE THAT SHIT.
Rachel's subjecting me to it right now.
Thanks sis.
Hope you all tuned into that show tonight with all the old washed up singers from the 80's and 90's who came back and sang their old hits and then sang remakes of current songs (Ryan Cabrerra song? Enrique Iglesias?) They were tarnishing their good names by singing said songs.
They didn't do all that bad tho. Loverboy, CeCe Peniston, Arrested Development (Horseshoooees), Flock of Seagulls, and Tiffany rocked the mic tonight and they were goooood.
Props to the has-beens. Rock on.
OH.
Shout out to Fanny: hope you made it to Savannah safely. Does anyone wanna let me know if she made it ok?
Shout out to Bri: I found Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers in the 5 dollar bin at Walmart last week and almost did a cartwheel in the aisle! Rachel found that shit. Been looking for it on DVD and she fished out the only copy they had there! SCORE! Then got Earth Girls Are Easy too! It was a $5 evening! (Got rid of my shitty VHS copies).
I am not doing a DAMN thing here in VA but sit around, get sis from school, visit grandma, bring her stuff, help with meals, that's it. Tried to draw tonight and couldn't come up with anything bt a random Chucky scribble and a bear with a bees' nest over his head.
Raaaandom shit.
Hope your days are going better folks.
Peace out and be in touch soon!